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The Emotional Support Thread

Ryantology said:
I actually started fan editing a year ago because I had a nervous breakdown brought on by severe depression and anxiety. I was forced to take a medical leave from work and had too much time to think which was the last thing I wanted.
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You're not the only one.  It's good to have your input in this thread.  :)
 
Captain Khajiit said:
Ryantology said:
I actually started fan editing a year ago because I had a nervous breakdown brought on by severe depression and anxiety. I was forced to take a medical leave from work and had too much time to think which was the last thing I wanted.
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You're not the only one.  It's good to have your input in this thread.  :)
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Of course! Any little thing helps, right? I just think it’s wonderful people in this site have the empathy to care for people they most likely have never met. It’s a good community to be a part of.
 
Handman said:
I suppose the only thing that can be said is that at least we're trying.  Maybe we're spending our time on the wrong people, or maybe feeling a bit unappreciated every now and again is worth the joys they bring us.  I don't know.  But, it's something.
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It's a numbers game. Talk to many different people and one of them is bound to be compatible with you.
 
My sister acts completely harsh and straight up mean to our mother, and then continues talking to me as if nothing happened. Whenever me and my mother are alone, she tells me how stressful and hurtful it can be. I feel so bad, not to mention uncomfortable and sad because of it. My sister really doesn't realize she's doing anything wrong, and there's nothing I can do about it.
 
I'm sorry to hear that.  It sounds like your mother needs to talk to her.
 
I got a box in the mail from my mother.  It contained snacks; some Pringles, some cookies, some candy bars, basic stuff.  I almost cried.  I almost wish my parents didn't care about me, so I could write them off as bigots, estrange myself, and go live my gay life.  But I can't, because they do love me, and they do mean well, so I have to hide forever because I feel like I owe it to them to pretend to be the good boy they think I am; a "boy after God's own heart" as my father has been so fond of saying.  If there is a God, I have to believe he hates me.  After all, I have his heart, and I hate me.
 
I believe you are a man after God's own heart, and God doesn't hate you.
 
Hombre, you may choose to hide your nature from your folks a while longer (no judgment whatsoever), but no, you do not owe them to be someone you're not, nor a performance of the same. And while I don't want to give false hope, sometimes the most homophobic of parents eventually deprogram themselves from petty bigotries. If it happens, it probably won't be overnight, but, if it helps, maybe don't think that when you do come out, you'll have to give up on them permanently. Maybe think of it as taking a break from the status quo until a better one comes along.
 
I love them, I think, but as I'm sure you all know by now that I'm not the biggest fan of my parents.  I have my reasons for not wanting to talk to them or be around them very often.  As such, being on break from school, I've spent much of my time in my room, either sleeping, dicking around online, or watching DS9.  Well now my dad's pissed at me for it.  "Hiding," he said I was, and he's honestly not far off.  I don't see how getting mad at me will make me want to hide less, though.

I wish I was back at school.  Or maybe I wish I was still asleep.  Or maybe I just wish I was dead.
 
^ In my opinion, there's almost certainly no such thing. (But still, don't hurt yourself.)
 
@"suspiciouscoffee" I know this is going to sound cliche, and I know I’m just a hopeful lucky teenager, and maybe you don’t really consider killing yourself, but I just wanted to say suicide is not the answer. Religious or otherwise, there are endless reasons why you shouldn’t do it.

There is so much that you have to live for. Even for a small moment of happiness that is the best feeling in the world... Even the feeling of sadness shows you are sad for something you have and want to get better: yourself, your life. All that compared to... emptiness... Endless nothingness... I wouldn’t recommend it.

Hope this helps in any case.
 
@"suspiciouscoffee" don't know what to say except I'd miss you.
 
I really appreciate you guys.  Thank you.

Tonight was awful.  Don't feel like explaining, not worth the effort.  Things suck and I am shit.
 
suspiciouscoffee said:
I really appreciate you guys.  Thank you.

Tonight was awful.  Don't feel like explaining, not worth the effort.  Things suck and I am shit.
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It’s been my experience that stress, depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts make us illogical which leads to us being exceedingly hard on ourselves. Granted, I don’t know you, but I genuinely think you are being too hard on yourself. I have no way to tell what it’s like to feel what you’re going through. All I can say is that I came very close to suicide several times. Obviously I didn’t do it and I’m glad I didn’t. Are things great for me now? Not at all. They’re at least tolerable and manageable. While I still have days filled with despair, it’s not every day. I’m so sorry that you have to feel the way you do. That you have so much on your plate. If you ever need someone to reach out to, feel free to message me. I hope it gets better for you.
 
For the last couple months, my sister has been dating this guy she met over the Internet — a trucker who resembles Liv Ullman if Liv Ullman was a man with a beard. Anyway, the guy got her pregnant; it looks like she's been with child for three weeks now, give-or-take. It looks like the guy's gonna do the right thing and stick by her to see the child gets taken care of.

The problem, as always, is my parents. My parents are Armstrongists — followers of a particularly vacuous pseudo-Christian cult founded by an incestuous racist — while this guy follows New Age beliefs. Anyway, he wanted to take my sister and celebrate the holidays with his family. As I've mentioned previously, my parents are stringently anti-Christmas, and they've been adamant in their refusal to give her permission to go. So for the last couple days, my parents have been spewing slanderous trash about how this guy worships the devil and wants to seduce her away from The Truth™ and break up our family and yada yada yada. So the guy's going off alone and my sister's upset, as you can quite imagine.

Make no mistake, I'm not the biggest fan of my sister's beau. Anybody who takes a girl out and makes her pay for two $20 burgers, who enters your home without knocking, and refuses to eat the food you've prepared has to be something of an asshole. However, those are strictly personality faults, and have nothing to do his spiritual beliefs or the holidays he chooses to celebrate. And though I often don't get along with my sister, I loathe seeing my parents do this to her; if a wedge is ever driven between my sister and this family, it'll be solely the fault of my parents, not her boyfriend.

I fear for the future of this child. Brought into this world unbidden, to a mother who isn't fit to be one and a father who may very well be driven off, with overbearing maternal grandparents who'll do everything in their power to see it raised in the same oppressive fundamentalist environment my sister and I were, in poverty — God almighty.
 
Very sorry to hear about that.  I feel almost lucky to be gay when I read stories like that.  I won't bring a child into this world, or into my family.  Best wishes for you sister and future niece/nephew.

On an tangentially related note: I wonder sometimes if God gave my siblings and I to my parents as we are—ingrates with poor mental health and even not-so-great physical health, what with the Marfan syndrome and all—as punishment for playing Him (if God wanted them to have kids, they wouldn't have needed IVF, right?).
 
i don't believe God punishes any of us; we do that entirely by ourselves.
 
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