Wonder Woman 1984: Wings of Asteria

[ArtisDead]

@tremault you are actually qualified to review an edit for approval if you feel up to it. You may want to have one of us ride with you on your first go.

 

[Wakeupkeo]

This edit is very promising for a first time submission, light years better than most first submissions. The fact that most are only music transition issues is a great sign of high skill, even if the overall edit is a bit conservative. That is actually recommended for a first edit, keeps that list small to know the level expected for approval. Unfortunately, its got a bit of minor technical issues that need cleaning up before academy approval. I think they are minor enough that it can get it to that approval level without issue!

I had narrative issues myself for a couple cut choices, but not enough to negate approval - especially because the source has more plot holes than swiss cheese. My advice is to fix the seven technical issue timestamps I mention in PM, and let @ArtisDead and @tremault help on anything else they notice, and then let me give it another look for approval.

Again, nice work on a first time edit!

 

[tremault]

I took some time to look for potential fixes here so It took me longer than expected and I have to stop halfway through, I'm posting my notes so far.
Good job on this, there are very likely many edits that I completely failed to notice, but here is everything I did notice up until the bit with Barbara searching the microfiche archives.


* 0:00:00 it is part of fanedit site rules that viewers must own the original to view edits. The intro message needs to be amended to reflect this or removed.

* 0:44:51 At this point, it is quite Jarring that Steve suddenly appears. There is no journey from shock to incredulity to realisation. Diana needs time to emotionally process this. There are many shots that could be used. I'd try and use as many shots of the prior interaction as you can, the shot of the watch being placed in her hand. You can obscure his face somehow as though she doesn't want to acknowledge it. you could even possibly use some shots from the first WW movie to show her struggling with her memories.
as a most straightforward idea though, I'd crop the frame so his face is just out of view and show her being pursued by him, then she turns away from the fountain and tries to leave, we see her being held back by the hand, then show her face as she realises it. You probably have your own ideas about it though so I suggest playing with it.
for the audio, you can use https://melody.ml/ to separate music and vocals and then repair the soundtrack.

* 0:47:03 The apartment scene; at the start of it, you could start Diana's dialogue "oh so this is how you found me" before you cut to the interior. This layering would help ease us in as I initially felt like it was abrupt. the scene also feels short so at the end, I think you can show him looking in the mirror as long as you don't show the reverse shot of the mirror, you could possibly include some of his criticisms of what he sees if you use shots of diana as cutaways.

* 1:03:41 This is an abrupt cut, I don't yet understand why we are shown the magazine about King of Crude, but the rest is omitted. If the King of Crude is to be cut out of the movie, then why not cut at 1:03:21 instead? If you want to keep in the fact Max has gone to Cairo, then it might be better to cut a little later, maybe just after Steve's comments about how fast planes go. The audio at the beginning of the next scene needs to be removed. since a new track starts as Barbara is scanning the computer screen, then it's probably best to carry over the audio from Diana and Steve in Max's office.

 

[CriticalHitRate]

I've hit a roadblock. There's a problem with my project file, and I have been unable to resolve it. I anticipate it will be necessary to redo my edits. If you're still reviewing it, I'd leave it up to you whether you'd like to continue or table it until there's a new cut (realistically, it could be a while). For what it's worth, I don't intend to change the scope of the project, only to address the feedback I've received. That said, it's possible I could introduce new technical issues on the way. But while I'm working, I'll create a log of time stamps to expedite future reviews.

 

[Wakeupkeo]

Your decision to rebuild shows dedication, which is a positive in this community.

Of course, I’m still in. Good luck bud.

 

[tremault]

Same here. I realise I haven't provided the second part of my feedback yet, but It's high on my priority list. I've been finalising my Thor love and Thunder edit so that's been taking a lot of my attention, that's why I didn't go straight back to it, but that's mostly dealt with now.
Hopefully watch the rest and provide feedback tonight or tomorrow.

I give you props for sticking with it. great strength of character.

 

[ArtisDead]

Okay. So...Tremault will continue their review of the existing file but you won't be able to fix any of it until you have recreated the edit entirely?

 

[CriticalHitRate]

Correct. My problem is a little bit difficult to explain (and Google for troubleshooting), but essentially every instance of the source on my timeline starts from the beginning of the source instead of starting from where it's cut.

 

[tremault]

very oddly, I had the same issue with two clips today. I had reversed the time on them and they had reverted to just showing the end of the file.

A possible fix or at least a way to make it easier to fix, raise the clip up above all your other clips and move it all the way to the left. extend it out to the right and then when it reaches the end of empty spot, shrink it from the left. That would at least get it in the ballpark.

 

[ArtisDead]

Correct. My problem is a little bit difficult to explain (and Google for troubleshooting), but essentially every instance of the source on my timeline starts from the beginning of the source instead of starting from where it's cut.

What NLE are you using? That's never happened to me. But, instead of accepting the worst case scenario, reach out to a few of us via pm or here on your thread and maybe we can pull you through it like Tremault just attempted to do. It's worth a shot. There are some relatively sharp cookies on this forum.

 

[CriticalHitRate]

Greetings! Checking in to report I've finished redoing the rough cuts. Because of how much time elapsed, I couldn't remember my rationale for every decision... but redoing the rough cuts refreshed my memory enough to respond to some of the feedback more specifically.

* 0:00:00 it is part of fanedit site rules that viewers must own the original to view edits. The intro message needs to be amended to reflect this or removed.

No problem. I'm not sure whether there's a rule of thumb, but I'm leaning toward keeping at least some kind of introductory message, simply to alert folks who might have more than one version of which they're watching up front, instead of waiting ~17 minutes for the first cut.

* 0:44:51 At this point, it is quite Jarring that Steve suddenly appears. There is no journey from shock to incredulity to realisation. Diana needs time to emotionally process this. There are many shots that could be used. I'd try and use as many shots of the prior interaction as you can, the shot of the watch being placed in her hand. You can obscure his face somehow as though she doesn't want to acknowledge it. you could even possibly use some shots from the first WW movie to show her struggling with her memories.
as a most straightforward idea though, I'd crop the frame so his face is just out of view and show her being pursued by him, then she turns away from the fountain and tries to leave, we see her being held back by the hand, then show her face as she realises it. You probably have your own ideas about it though so I suggest playing with it.
for the audio, you can use https://melody.ml/ to separate music and vocals and then repair the soundtrack.

I agree her reaction time is a little bit shorter than I'd prefer, although previously I decided I could live with it. How she would respond to seeing Steve earlier from across the room (as himself) I think would be subjective speculation. She could struggle to believe her eyes and ignore it, or she could immediately run with arms wide open. Arguably, her love for Steve being a blind spot is a theme of the movie, so I think it's reasonable she might accept it at face value (pun intended) first and process it later. Anyway, I'll play with it.

* 0:47:03 The apartment scene; at the start of it, you could start Diana's dialogue "oh so this is how you found me" before you cut to the interior. This layering would help ease us in as I initially felt like it was abrupt. the scene also feels short so at the end, I think you can show him looking in the mirror as long as you don't show the reverse shot of the mirror, you could possibly include some of his criticisms of what he sees if you use shots of diana as cutaways.

Good suggestions.

* 1:03:41 This is an abrupt cut, I don't yet understand why we are shown the magazine about King of Crude, but the rest is omitted. If the King of Crude is to be cut out of the movie, then why not cut at 1:03:21 instead? If you want to keep in the fact Max has gone to Cairo, then it might be better to cut a little later, maybe just after Steve's comments about how fast planes go. The audio at the beginning of the next scene needs to be removed. since a new track starts as Barbara is scanning the computer screen, then it's probably best to carry over the audio from Diana and Steve in Max's office.

Hopefully the second half will clarify. The King of Crude is still a character, and he still upsets everyone by claiming disputed territory. There just isn't a literal wall dividing Egypt. Good technical suggestions - thank you.

 

[tremault]

Greetings! Checking in to report I've finished redoing the rough cuts. Because of how much time elapsed, I couldn't remember my rationale for every decision... but redoing the rough cuts refreshed my memory enough to respond to some of the feedback more specifically.

great work!

No problem. I'm not sure whether there's a rule of thumb, but I'm leaning toward keeping at least some kind of introductory message, simply to alert folks who might have more than one version of which they're watching up front, instead of waiting ~17 minutes for the first cut.

yes, there are some custom intros available in the resources section if you like. it's up to you whether you have an intro or not.

Hopefully the second half will clarify. The King of Crude is still a character, and he still upsets everyone by claiming disputed territory. There just isn't a literal wall dividing Egypt. Good technical suggestions - thank you.

Yes I see you included them being in egypt, just not the stealing thing. Well I have watched the second half now, so more notes here :-

• 01:09:26 this is abrupt, they are suddenly in a desert, it's clearly egypt and it's raising the question of "how did they get there". I realise you cut out the stealing the jet, but I think there needs to be some other way of establishing "they went to egypt" before showing them there in the car. the plane tickets are enough to establish that max went to egypt, but there needs to be something showing Diana and Steve deciding to go. maybe you could just do it implicitly by putting an insert of a passenger aeroplane taking off immediately after the scene where they find those plane tickets? then maybe at some time after Barbara's scenes, show some footage of an airport with the feet of two people and luggage

• 01:16:07 audio cut is abrupt, needs smoothing out or music could be removed with the AI tool

• 01:17:57 The location transition that is removed here, needs to be replaced with something. either another indication that they have travelled might do in a pinch, but that might feel repetitive if you use my earlier suggestion. instead, a time passing indicator might work, such as showing the sunset on egypt and sunrise in the next location, for example.

• 01:50:08 why is she suddenly able to fly? was that ever a thing before? This is pretty confusing. I checked the theatrical... why did you remove her learning to fly? that sequence is amazing! so emotional and perfectly placed in her thoughts of Steve and a way to honour his memory.

• on a personal note, I don't like that you removed all the people renouncing their wishes. it makes me feel like Diana's words were falling on deaf ears and that Max renouncing his wish, took away the wishes of all those people. it takes away a strong message of hope for humanity. It's not technically problematic though, no issues with cuts or continuity, it works if you wish it to remain that way. I just don't personally like it.

For the most part, I enjoy what you've done. The learning to fly removal is a dealbreaker for me, so depending on what you decide on that, it might or might not be my go-to version.
I got to say, it was a pleasure getting the opportunity to watch this without the real problematic elements. I absolutely LOVE this movie in many ways and if you decided to restore the flying, you'd be providing a true gift.

 

[ArtisDead]

So glad that this edit is going forward. That's some amazing feedback!

 

[CriticalHitRate]

I have an idea to reintroduce some of the flying (to Egypt) sequence, but I’d like to avoid reintroducing plot holes I hoped to eliminate by removing it too.

Specifically, why would Diana have the security clearance required to access a hangar at all, let alone after hours?

Does the Smithsonian actually maintain functional aircraft anyway? (Beyond the scope of interpretive display.)

If so, would the aircraft be fueled and ready to fly to Cairo at the drop of a hat?

I’d feel a lot better if Diana were to explain something like she called in a favor from a friend who arranged it all, or even simply jumped a fence at the airport.

Any suggestions?

 

[Wakeupkeo]

You could dwell on the found airplane tickets a bit longer by have Steve simply react to the amount of time flight travel takes, that might be enough for the "idea of them flying" works, and still avoid all those plot holes.

 

[tremault]

Sorry, I think I gave the wrong impression, all my feedback about flying is referring to Diana learning how to fly/glide by herself.

 

[tremault]

You could dwell on the found airplane tickets a bit longer by have Steve simply react to the amount of time flight travel takes, that might be enough for the "idea of them flying" works, and still avoid all those plot holes.

I think that is needed, it would help matters, but I think something extra is required. I feel like it needs something, either a line of dialogue that mentions travelling or some visual of a passenger aeroplane.

 

[Wakeupkeo]

I think we’re referring to the note:

01:09:26 this is abrupt, they are suddenly in a desert, it's clearly egypt and it's raising the question of "how did they get there".

I had the same narrative I issue here in PM discussion

 

[tremault]

I think we’re referring to the note:

01:09:26 this is abrupt, they are suddenly in a desert, it's clearly egypt and it's raising the question of "how did they get there".

I had the same narrative I issue here in PM discussion

Ah yes, I think a) we have the same issue and b) I managed to unintentionally confuse some points for you guys.
I want to be clear that I totally agree with the decision to cut out the jet plane.

 

[CriticalHitRate]

Doesn’t the scene of her teaching herself how to fly include dialogue from their conversation in the cockpit on the way to Egypt? I thought it would be confusing without the antecedent.