Machete Sharpened

[Gieferg]

Haha! I've reluctantly brought a bunch of blu-rays I didn't like just for scenes.

Yeah, me too I may buy some straight to video Seagal flicks, but I can (in some way) appreciate pure ridiculousness of that guy.
Machete sequel isn't expensive, but there are some movies that I just don't want to put on my shelf. And this is one of them (probably those sci-fi elements killed it for me). And, frankly, I didnt have any interesting ideas about what to do with it (except that one for post-credits scene, which I've replaced with something else).

 

[wilhelm scream]

Yeah, me too I may buy some straight to video Seagal flicks, but I can (in some way) appreciate pure ridiculousness of that guy.
Machete sequel isn't expensive, but there are some movies that I just don't want to put on my shelf. And this is one of them (probably those sci-fi elements killed it for me). And, frankly, I didnt have any interesting ideas about what to do with it (except that one for post-credits scene, which I've replaced with something else).

I can't decide who's more ridiculous in terms of straight to video flicks, Seagal or Bruce Willis

 

[Gieferg]

Never seen anything from Willis, which would be comparably ridiculous to Seagal's "finest" (but I didnt really watch any video flicks with him to be honest). Also, Seagal is ridiculous as a whole, not only his later movies.

 

[wilhelm scream]

Your not missing out, he usually only shows up for about 10 minutes of the film (as he usually only does 1-2 days on-set), and the rest of the film features an obvious body double (and you can tell it's a double, because the back of their head, looks slighly different to Willis's head).

Never seen anything from Willis, which would be comparably ridiculous to Seagal's "finest" (but I didnt really watch any video flicks with him to be honest). Also, Seagal is ridiculous as a whole, not only his later movies.

 

[Gieferg]

That description seems very similar to Seagal's work.

 

[Gieferg]

it's available for anyone interested.

 

[Gieferg]

Updated version with some grindhouse-style trailers added at the beginning is up.

 

[Gieferg]

Reveal message

While I really enjoyed this crazy, extra-grindhoused edit, I still do prefer the original. Now if the new porno scene and the extra Segal scenes were removed, this edit would be a huge improvement over the original theatrical version

And how about the flashback sequence near the beginning?

 

[krausfadr]

if it’s in the bar that was awesome. I didn’t even realize that wasn‘t a deleted scene. Might just add some more screen glitches to blend it. (The film scratches and stuff).
EDIT: also for me personally, I wasn’t into the 4th wall breaking stuff in the middle where we see we’re watching a movie. At the beginning it was reasonable to use it to show your new credits/logo. But in the middle it was more of an interruption. Again that’s just my subjective opinion. Others may like it.

EDIT: if it’s the flashback with Segal shooting a crowd I think it’s more random/confusing than adding anything. For my own ideal edit, I’d remove.

 

[Gieferg]

It was the scene at the beginning in the bar with some flashbacks with Seagal, some stripper, and machete's wife. This sequence was build from six different sources (not counting a song) and none of theme are deleted material from Machete).

Scene with Seagal shooting random people is not meant to be a flashback, but initially it was meant to be Machete's nightmare about his enemy but it didnt' really work with the scene with him waking up so eventually landed in other place. This is a mash-up of two different movies based on some gif I've seen once. And yes, that's the absurd part of the edit as is scene with "Andrea" (which is the real name of the actress) - the funny thing about that last one is the fact that this scene looks like some random addition even in the movie it was taken from (and of course it doesn't end there the way it ends here). And the third (chronologically first) of sensei Steven's merry adventures has been heavily re-edited because he originally sat there an had a conversation with the other guy, when the Russians bursted in.

As for the added blood:

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headshot by Seagal's henchwoman at the beginning (there was blood, but now there's a little more)
Sis' throat being slitted
Senator's death
some guys being shot by Don Johnson's character at the final showdown when "trigger happy" song plays.

I wasn’t into the 4th wall breaking stuff in the middle where we see we’re watching a movie. At the beginning it was reasonable to use it to show your new credits/logo.

There's a third one too

Others may like it.

yeah, some people like it.