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We all need a laugh

lewis886

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ok.... a friend of mine just told me this story last night.... it has to do with me, but i wasn't directly involved.... i laughed for about 15 minutes straight after reading it..... lol she was going to text me and ask me when a lunar eclipse was going to start.... thinking she had my phone number.... but she actually didn't.... lol
enjoy ;) oh, and she was a little drunk while telling me, so excuse her typing errors ;)

"
okay, it was the night of the full moon eclipse and I was pretty sure I had your number in my phone...so I texted who I thought was you to ask "you what time it was supposed to start......well, obviously it wasn't you.....it was my friend daves, cousin, eric...and his girlfriend had his phone trying to figure out who I was....so, I got a text back saying...who is this? i repliied, amanda, maybe you should save my number....."you" texted back that you werent sure what time it started but maybe we could watch it together...i said, "what do you mean, together?"..."you" said, well, at your place...where do you live and I'll be over then we can have some fun?''.....I then asked you what you mean by fun...and you said, you know what fun means, either you want it or you dont.....i replied, "are you drunk or high?"......then, "you" said, no, I just want to come over and make you feel good"...lol.....keep in mind that I thoght this was you texting me the whole time. it ended a little after that.....and I was thinking, wow, he must have been drunk or something adn I left it at that...well, I woke up and had a voice mail on my phone and it was a girl named liz, who said she was "your" girlfriend and to stop texting you and she called me a bitch...haha. I freaked out and I was really leary about going into work, thinking it was your girlfriend that had cussed me out......but then before I went to work I figured it all out...so that's my story, and I hope you could read it okay because it'shaard to tell a story with a buzz......lol. so, yeah, my friends, cousin, has a psycho girlfriend...obviously....
"
 

lewis886

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lol no, she wasn't drunk when she was trying to text me.... only half-drunk when telling me the story last night lol

she did think i was drunk though lol

i just can't believe that it actually happened... and she really thought it was me that was texting all that stuff back to her...... SOOO funny lol
 

Aztek463

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lewis886 said:
ok.... a friend of mine just told me this story last night.... it has to do with me, but i wasn't directly involved.... i laughed for about 15 minutes straight after reading it..... lol she was going to text me and ask me when a lunar eclipse was going to start.... thinking she had my phone number.... but she actually didn't.... lol
enjoy ;) oh, and she was a little drunk while telling me, so excuse her typing errors ;)

"
okay, it was the night of the full moon eclipse and I was pretty sure I had your number in my phone...so I texted who I thought was you to ask "you what time it was supposed to start......well, obviously it wasn't you.....it was my friend daves, cousin, eric...and his girlfriend had his phone trying to figure out who I was....so, I got a text back saying...who is this? i repliied, amanda, maybe you should save my number....."you" texted back that you werent sure what time it started but maybe we could watch it together...i said, "what do you mean, together?"..."you" said, well, at your place...where do you live and I'll be over then we can have some fun?''.....I then asked you what you mean by fun...and you said, you know what fun means, either you want it or you dont.....i replied, "are you drunk or high?"......then, "you" said, no, I just want to come over and make you feel good"...lol.....keep in mind that I thoght this was you texting me the whole time. it ended a little after that.....and I was thinking, wow, he must have been drunk or something adn I left it at that...well, I woke up and had a voice mail on my phone and it was a girl named liz, who said she was "your" girlfriend and to stop texting you and she called me a bitch...haha. I freaked out and I was really leary about going into work, thinking it was your girlfriend that had cussed me out......but then before I went to work I figured it all out...so that's my story, and I hope you could read it okay because it'shaard to tell a story with a buzz......lol. so, yeah, my friends, cousin, has a psycho girlfriend...obviously....
"

The hell? I have a cousin named Eric (my name is, in fact, Dave), and for some reason this story seems very familiar...
 

lewis886

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ZOINKS SCOOB.... THAT'S REALLY CREEPY!!

lol
 

Aztek463

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I'm also very good friends with a girl named Liz...WHAT THE FUCK!!!!
 

ThrowgnCpr

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Washington Post Neologism Contest winners:


1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas
from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting
lucky.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee! intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming
only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come
at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've
accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your
bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit
you're eating.
 

boon23

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I hope I will remember a lot of them to use in the future.
My favorites:
Ignoranus, Bozone, Glibido
 

boon23

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not fun. It's just plain disgusting. A warning would have been nice.
 

nOmArch

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thats so last week, you should now be worshipping at...

The Church of Fudge (obviosly do not click this if you're under 18 or at work or have a nervous disposition or dont like videos with poo in them)

Link Removed.
 

boon23

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this is a 13+ forum, n0march...
could you remove the link, please, and just name the website where it is if you have to?
 

nOmArch

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yep no worries :)

at least i put a warning on mine.
 

ThrowgnCpr

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boon23 said:
not fun. It's just plain disgusting. A warning would have been nice.

agreed. that was plain nasty. closed the window after about 1 second
 
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