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Star Wars (I-III) Reimagined...

Neglify

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Sweet cover. Only suggestion I have is change "After a 1000 years..." to either "After a thousand years..." or "After 1000 years..."
 

bionicbob

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Neglify said:
Sweet cover. Only suggestion I have is change "After a 1000 years..." to either "After a thousand years..." or "After 1000 years..."

Oh I agree, but I am just transferring what NewSpock wrote with a few punctuation/grammar corrections. ;-)
 

TM2YC

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Neglify said:
Sweet cover. Only suggestion I have is change "After a 1000 years..." to either "After a thousand years..." or "After 1000 years..."

Or "1000 Generations". It means the same thing... apparently.
 

NewSpock

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bionicbob said:
Final version:

RAX7HoD.jpg

Thanks, bionicbob, looks really nice!:)
 

Vultural

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"A 1000" years is grammatically incorrect.
Either 1000 years
or
one thousand years
or
a thousand years.

Reference Neg's post #61.
He is one 100% percent correct.
 

TV's Frink

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Vultural said:
He is one 100% percent correct.

I see what you did there, if you meant to do it.
 

NewSpock

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ssj said:

Ah, thanks, have forgotten that line. In the Star Wars Episode I they say that the sith were extinct for a millenium. It doesn't have to be a contradiction, the Jedi could have been the guardians for peace and justice for a thousand generations and yet the sith could have been extinct only a millenium. But still some doubts remain.:noidea:
 

Vultural

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TV's Frink said:
I see what you did there, if you meant to do it.

Yes. A lean towards Grammar Police, which I think most here try to resist.
What Neg pointed out, however, amounted to a printed error, and best to correct before FE approval.
 

Kal-El

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BOB, cover is spot on. Forget what I said :)

NewSpock said:
How about this for a synopsis?

"After a 1000 years the sith have returned. Will the jedi see through the cloud of the dark force before it consumes them?
Follow Anakin Skywalker on his path to become the greatest Jedi and having to make a choice that will forever decide his destiny."

Here's what I suggest:
After a thousand years the Sith have returned. Will the Jedi see through the Dark Side's machinations, or will it consume them? Follow Anakin Skywalker on this path to become the greatest Jedi as he is forced to make a choice that will forever decide his destiny.

Personally I feel it reads better (and looks better too) if you use the full pronunciation of the years and not the numbers. But that's just personal preference and NOOOOO ONE should take this as written word. Also Sith/Jedi is capitalised but I'm guessing you knew that and it was just a typo since you did capitalize Jedi the second time :) Also it's the Dark Side of the Force and not the Dark Force :) This isn't Dark Force Rising LMAO sorry :p and finally see through the cloud doesn't sound right, but I think I know what you're trying to say. It's more in the sense of Yoda's statement "The dark side clouds everything. Impossible to see the future is." Right? :)
 

bionicbob

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I will happily alter the back text is NewSpock requests it. :)
 

NewSpock

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Kal-El said:
BOB, cover is spot on. Forget what I said :)



Here's what I suggest:


Personally I feel it reads better (and looks better too) if you use the full pronunciation of the years and not the numbers. But that's just personal preference and NOOOOO ONE should take this as written word. Also Sith/Jedi is capitalised but I'm guessing you knew that and it was just a typo since you did capitalize Jedi the second time :) Also it's the Dark Side of the Force and not the Dark Force :) This isn't Dark Force Rising LMAO sorry :p and finally see through the cloud doesn't sound right, but I think I know what you're trying to say. It's more in the sense of Yoda's statement "The dark side clouds everything. Impossible to see the future is." Right? :)

I think you are right: "A thousand years" looks better, and " Follow Anakin Skywalker on this path to become the greatest Jedi as he is forced to make a choice that will forever decide his destiny. " sounds better.

And you are right, "dark side" is more to the point.

But I like the word "cloud" in there, so my preferred version would be:



"After a thousand years the Sith have returned. Will the Jedi see through the cloud of the dark side before it consumes them? Follow Anakin Skywalker on his path to become the greatest Jedi as he is forced to make a choice that will forever decide his destiny."
 

Kal-El

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NewSpock said:
I think you are right: "A thousand years" looks better, and " Follow Anakin Skywalker on this path to become the greatest Jedi as he is forced to make a choice that will forever decide his destiny. " sounds better.

And you are right, "dark side" is more to the point.

But I like the word "cloud" in there, so my preferred version would be:



"After a thousand years the Sith have returned. Will the Jedi see through the cloud of the dark side before it consumes them? Follow Anakin Skywalker on his path to become the greatest Jedi as he is forced to make a choice that will forever decide his destiny."

I perfectly understand your choice of keeping cloud. It already looks a lot better though, if I my say so :) I hope you don't mind me pushing a bit, but what about shroud? It has a similar meaning in this case and it sounds better?

Will the Jedi see through the Dark Side's shroud before it consumes them?

I'll stop bugging you about the text now, regardless of what you think :p
 

NewSpock

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Kal-El said:

Will the Jedi see through the Dark Side's shroud before it consumes them?


I like that, shroud it should be.:)
 

TV's Frink

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Kal-El said:
Will the Jedi see through the Dark Side's shroud before it consumes them?

Tune in next week! Same Sith time, same Sith channel!
 

NewSpock

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Thanks, bionicbob. :)

I still have to preview the edit, so it will take sometime, but maybe in February it can be released.
 
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