I feel like this was an incredibly successful edit. I don't think anything of value was lost in the cuts. My biggest complaint with this episode still stands, namely Chekov's extreme over-reaction to finding the deceased researcher at the beginning of the episode. Obviously, this scene couldn't be cut because it was necessary to the resolution. But the writer could have come up with another event that led to Chekov being terribly "startled". The idea that a somewhat-seasoned starfleet officer would be terrified upon encountering a dead old man resting in state on a table is a little hard to swallow.
Dropping the romantic subplot between Kirk and Wallace led to absolutely no difference to the episode. Her character essentially had nothing to do anyway.
Great job Warlord!
I do have one question: Why cut the transporter effect in the very first scene? This is just curiosity, not a complaint. Obviously, the viewer understands how they got to the planet, so the shot wasn't strictly necessary. I'm just wondering if you dropped it for time, or had another motivation.