Rogue One: Where Rebels Dare (TM2YC Fanfix) - Restructure/Less fanservice

[Masirimso17]

That crawl surely works well. "has now conceived of" feels a bit weird though. 

The "now" bit? I think I added that word partly for cosmetic reasons, so the text in that line looked nicely space.

And also so you could say "f*** off the canon Prequels!"  (i.e. The Death Star didn't start construction 19 years ago!!!)

Um...

I wonder what George was thinking... That and Anakin building 3PO and R2 having jets to let him fly... getting off topic sorry

 

[TM2YC]

Now that I'm going with a crawl at the start, the brief title sequence after the prologue needed to be removed. So I've made a new transition forward 13 years, with a dissolve, a "13 years later..." titlecard, some rescoring, new soundFX, and 2 new FX shots:

(Password: fanedit.org)

 

[Canon Editor]

The idea works well.  Maybe having the “13 years later” title card fade in could play smoother?  
The shot of the planet (Jedha?) in the distance looks just slightly funny but the effect shot is admirable.  Good job.

 

[TM2YC]

Maybe having the “13 years later” title card fade in could play smoother?

It's supposed to time with the music beat.

The shot of the planet (Jedha?) in the distance looks just slightly funny but the effect shot is admirable.

It's not Jedha, it's just some random planet I found on Google. In what way is it looking funny?

 

[Masirimso17]

I feel like the new pan down showing the Death Star kinda ruins the “stars to Destroyer to DS reveal” shot. Maybe a hard cut after “Thirteen years later” would work better? Just my opinion.

Also maybe font for “Thirteen years later” could be adjusted? I don’t know why but it looked off. I read that the closest End Credits font was Franklin Gothic Medium, and the “A long time ago” was closest to Franklin Gothic Book.

 

[DigModiFicaTion]

It looks fantastically impressive, but it feels like two shots with an insert between them, imho. I think this is large part due to the drastic difference between the sudden music changes from the movie. Perhaps if you take out the new empire theme and just have the tie noise and some rumble for the destroyers it would blend better?

 

[DigModiFicaTion]

New thoughts. What if the scene played out in this order:

Jyn looks up > tie fighter screams across screen > sd emerges from shadow > zoomed ds scene > far custom shot (no panning down) with 13 years later text (honestly not a fan of the on screen text) > Krennic and troopers arrive on sd bridge.

I'd personally axe the Rogue One and new Empire themes in this transition.

Do you plan to animate the tiny star destroyers and the DS dish?

 

[addiesin]

I like it for what it is. Looks professional, edited well.

However, the problem with it is inherent in the source. The movie starts for two minutes then restarts thirteen years later. The original film had no crawl to explain the information in the introductory few minutes. It seemed a weird choice to me even in the theatrical, like did nothing happen for thirteen years that would have been relevant to her character? How did she separate from Saw? Etc.

Could the intro be incorporated into the crawl and skipped entirely? Maybe not for this edit, you've already put a lot of work into this scene and the crawl separately. But it's something to think about, losing the time jumps would be more Star Warsy.

 

[TM2YC]

kinda ruins the “stars to Destroyer to DS reveal” shot.

I know what you mean. I considered removing the slow reveal star destroyer shot but it's such an awesome shot I wouldn't want to.

Also maybe font for “Thirteen years later” could be adjusted? I don’t know why but it looked off.

It's close enough. Here is a comparison with "A long time ago" done in the same font...

I think it's just looking off because it's against a starfield, against a moving background and in the middle of the movie... although doing that comparison makes me realise I forgot one of the four dots .

the drastic difference between the sudden music changes from the movie. Perhaps if you take out the new empire theme and just have the tie noise and some rumble for the destroyers it would blend better?

Oh really? I thought it was a smooth sound with one fading out and another coming in. I'm not keen on removing the Empire theme but that idea could work.

New thoughts. What if the scene played out in this order:

Jyn looks up > tie fighter screams across screen > sd emerges from shadow > zoomed ds scene > far custom shot (no panning down) with 13 years later text (honestly not a fan of the on screen text) > Krennic and troopers arrive on sd bridge.

So move from close, to far away instead? Nice idea and worth a try.

The onscreen text is unavoidable, unless we cut to Jyn waking up before the DS. Which is something I originally wanted to avoid because she isn't important until the Rebels discover her link to Galen. I'll have to decide which I dislike the most, cutting to adult Jyn for no goddamn reason (which neatly achieves the skip forward in time visually), or having un-SW like text on screen... hmmm.

Do you plan to animate the tiny star destroyers and the DS dish?

The SD, the dish (plus the shadow on and from the dish), the DS itself and the light on it are already animated but due to the vast scale they don't and shouldn't move much.

the problem with it is inherent in the source. The movie starts for two minutes then restarts thirteen years later. The original film had no crawl to explain the information in the introductory few minutes. It seemed a weird choice to me even in the theatrical, like did nothing happen for thirteen years that would have been relevant to her character? How did she separate from Saw? Etc.

Could the intro be incorporated into the crawl and skipped entirely? Maybe not for this edit, you've already put a lot of work into this scene and the crawl separately. But it's something to think about, losing the time jumps would be more Star Warsy.

I totally agree on all of that but R1 is what it is and I don't think cutting a 7-minute scene that sets up 3 of the already sketchily setup characters is going to improve the film unfortunately.

Food for thought. Thanks all . In other news, the opening crawl footage is all completed and ready to go (just no actual crawl yet).

 

[Moe_Syzlak]

The onscreen text is unavoidable, unless we cut to Jyn waking up before the DS. Which is something I originally wanted to avoid because she isn't important until the Rebels discover her link to Galen. I'll have to decide which I dislike the most, cutting to adult Jyn for no goddamn reason (which neatly achieves the skip forward in time visually), or having un-SW like text on screen... hmmm.

If I’m understand you correctly, I think we view the movie in fundamentally different ways. It seems you see the movie as a story about the Rebels so Jyn isn’t important until she is revealed to have a role in the Rebellion. Whereas I see the movie as Jyn’s story. To me, the biggest flaws with the theatrical release were when it got too far from that. As such, that’s why I argued for the elimination of so much of the first act that didn’t stay with Jyn in Digmodification’s edit.

 

[TM2YC]

The onscreen text is unavoidable, unless we cut to Jyn waking up before the DS. Which is something I originally wanted to avoid because she isn't important until the Rebels discover her link to Galen. I'll have to decide which I dislike the most, cutting to adult Jyn for no goddamn reason (which neatly achieves the skip forward in time visually), or having un-SW like text on screen... hmmm.

If I’m understand you correctly, I think we view the movie in fundamentally different ways. It seems you see the movie as a story about the Rebels so Jyn isn’t important until she is revealed to have a role in the Rebellion. Whereas I see the movie as Jyn’s story. To me, the biggest flaws with the theatrical release were when it got too far from that. As such, that’s why I argued for the elimination of so much of the first act that didn’t stay with Jyn in Digmodification’s edit.

Actually I think we both kind of agree what the problem is, just differ in how we'd mitigate it. The movie overall is Jyn's story but that story skips forward 13 years because nothing of consequence happens to Jyn in that time. It's only when her father and his connection to the Death Star reappears that she becomes important again. So I think it's best to focus on her at the moment when she becomes important again, rather than: Here is Jyn 13 years later... but since she's doing nothing of any interest, let's immediately cut to some other new characters who are actually doing interesting things.

If they'd wanted to stick with Jyn after the prologue they should have given her something interesting to do and something that would have linked her into the other people's stories better and in a way that she was an active participant. 'Star Wars Rebels' did a similar thing quite nicely, by introducing Ezra by showing him trying to steal the same shipment that the Rebels were trying to steal and the two joined forces that way.

 

[DigModiFicaTion]

the drastic difference between the sudden music changes from the movie. Perhaps if you take out the new empire theme and just have the tie noise and some rumble for the destroyers it would blend better?

Oh really? I thought it was a smooth sound with one fading out and another coming in. I'm not keen on removing the Empire theme but that idea could work.

Sorry, I don't think I was clear there. Your editing isn't drastic, the feeling of those two pieces of music are drastically different which clash in my head when they play right after each other.

 

[DominicCobb]

Or! No crawl?

 

[darthrush]

Please keep the crawl. Or release two versions which would be a cool idea. One would be traditional star wars with no title cards and a crawl for people like me and then there could be one more in line with the theatrical with location title cards and no crawl.

 

[Masirimso17]

Maybe the flashback scene acts as a prologue before the crawl?

 

[TM2YC]

I'll have to decide which I dislike the most, cutting to adult Jyn for no goddamn reason (which neatly achieves the skip forward in time visually), or having un-SW like text on screen... hmmm.

A couple of months working on BR2049 has given me plenty of time to think about that question ^ and I've decided against having on screen text (there is just no way to make it look/feel SW-like), which means I have to cut to adult Jyn after the prologue. So here is my new transition from young Jyn, to adult Jyn, to the completed DeathStar:

(Password: fanedit.org)

The cut from Saw to adult Jyn is similar to @"DigModiFicaTion" 's clever idea but slightly different in timing and audio. I elected to have no music during the short prison scene (to have a music break between prologue and present day), which meant the soundFX had to be rebuilt from scratch (hopefully it doesn't sound that way). Added a new wipe to the Tie-Fighter, with the ship re-timed to match the speed of the wipe.

 

[lapis molari]

The cut from Saw to adult Jyn is similar to @"DigModiFicaTion" 's clever idea but slightly different in timing and audio.

Looks really good! Adult Jyn lying on her bed thinking back of her days as young Jyn with Saw. This makes narrative sense why we see young Jyn: a flashback in adult Jyn's mind. And the transition is seamless.

 

[jswert123456]

cover version 1- work in progress

 

[Gaith]

^ Nice, though I'd remove the parentheses and put "A TM2YC Fanfix" somewhere else - it looks off as part of the main logo, IMHO.

 

[jswert123456]

cover version 2