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Daughter of Themyscira

krausfadr

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A fanedit in 4K HDR 5.1 channel surround. Runtime 2hr 03m.

intent
Wonder Woman was probably the best DC movie. As outstanding as it was, it’s weakness were:

The narration and tie-in to Batman v Superman felt shoehorned and generic
Poor acting from multiple actors slipped through the editing process
Some parts of the action sequences lacked energy and looked awkward
The slo-mo cinematography was not always up to the level of Snyder’s and sometimes focused on odd elements that didn’t need slo-mo
Steve was comical even in scenes which did not warrant it
Characters which were there mainly for humor, such as Charlie, were far too cartoonish
The dialogue could become a bit heavy on the expository
The storyline in the 3rd act became unfocused
Too much focus was put on Diana’s looks
The intent of this edit is to address these issues to remove or minimize them and for this story to take place only in the past with no narration from Diana.


change list
Moved the story of Zeus and Ares to the beginning. It is no longer visibly being told to young Diana; it’s being told to the audience.
Removed some cringey scenes with young Diana: pretending to fight, running around, jumping off a ledge and being caught by her mother. The storyline and acting took turns being bad.
Rearranged and tightened up the opening scenes of Themyscira and the Amazons training.
No tucking young Diana into bed or reading her the story.
After agreeing to the training, cut the Queen’s comment that Diana must not know how she came to be (left in her comment that Diana must not find out what she is).
Cut an awkward looking moment when Diana is hit in the face while training and then touches her jaw and mimes a weird motion.
Trimmed Menalippe reacting to Diana training and getting the upper hand. Actor, Lisa Loven Kongsli’s performance was iffy (throughout the film it ranged from wooden to awful, she had some pretty bad moments in ZSJL as well).
Added camera motion to parts of Diana’s training action sequences in Themyscira.
After Steve’s plane nosedives into the ocean, and Diana dives into the water, Steve is then already underwater, sinking.
Trimmed Steve initially looking up while underwater.
Removed the German’s line about the fog.
Added camera motion onto parts of the Germans at sea footage.
Steve does not immediately comment on Diana’s looks.
Cut Steve’s line asking Diana, “They have guns, right?” Unnecessary expository.
Trimmed various shots of the battle sequence in Themyscira for stronger action.
Sped up the Amazon swinging as she shoots the arrow.
Sped up the three solders shot at the same time by the Queen. Would have been a nice slo-mo shot but the action looked ridiculous.
Tightened up the interrogation antics. Steve doesn’t shout out, I’m a spy.
Cut Steve’s psychopath line, referring to Dr. Poison.
Cut Steve narrating that when he uncovered the enemies plans he had to do something (show don’t tell).
Trimmed parts of Dr. Poison’s human experimentation for better flow.
Cut Steve grabbing the book.
Cut Steve looking back at the building exploding.
Diana’s nurse doesn’t say “strange” to make sure we notice the healed wound.
Cut Steve laughing at his toe in the bath.
Steve doesn’t ask if he can ask questions. Trimmed some awkward looking around.
When Diana jumps the cliff onto the tower, she doesn’t smile all excited and then slip. On her initial jump she has to grasp the flat concrete.
On the sailboat as Diana and Steve rest, tightened up the scenes and removed Steve’s lines about him having vigor.
Ludendorff does not shoot his subordinate.
Ludendorff does not inhale the new type of gas right after Dr. Poison shows it to him. Also cut subsequent times he took the gas until much later. This let’s us have our doubts about the presence of Ares along with Steve.
Etta does not weirdly watch Steve and Diana walk off down the street.
Tightened up and livened up Diana fighting the men in the alleyway so the action is no longer so brutally sluggish. It’s a lighthearted scene but Diana should still be badass, not a joke.
No comedy routine with Etta coming back to apprehend the bad guy with the sword. No cyanide. The bad guy just slips away as Diana and Steve are distracted.
Diana doesn’t say mustard gas.
When Diana yells at the cowardly General, cut the second time she says that he should be ashamed to add more power to her statement.
Cut Charlie doing the cartoon face after getting punched out in the bar fight, and toned him way down in the bar.
Tightened up Diana’s bar fight. Removed the frightened and aroused joke.
In the bar, cut Etta muttering under her breath, “Sir Patrick” which was clearly a bad voiceover because somebody thought the audience would forget his name after Diana just said it two seconds earlier.
Cut Diana narrating after they arrive by boat near a warzone, “the gas will kill everybody.”
The German commander does not refer to Dr. Poison as Ludendorff’s witch. Cut to tighten his response, not because there was any issue with the line.
Cut Dr. Poison’s expository, saying the mask won’t help, after they start to gas the German commanders, and cut her and Ludendorff laughing.
Ludendorff does not say they have to prepare their demonstration. Added noise of panic and screams as the commanders die from the gas.
Charlie doesn’t dry his crotch over the fire. Chief does not greet Diana as if he is spellbound.
Trimmed Charlie having a fit after waking up from a nightmare.
Trimmed part of storming toward the church so Steve’s team isn’t moving slow and then the music doesn’t have a rough change.
Trimmed Diana staring affectionately after Steve shoots a soldier trying to kill her.
A little less lasso-ing in Veld.
Removed the joke about an island full of women like Diana with no men.
Cut the obstinate woman in the blue dress seeing and speaking with Diana.
Steve doesn’t ask to see Dr. Poison’s work, and trimmed her leaving after he notices Diana.
When Ludendorff dances with Diana he just tells her she knows nothing. Removed part of his line, “of the gods.”
Cut the whole subplot of Ludendorff gassing the village where Wonder Woman cries unconvincingly in the brown smoke about the devastation as we see ZERO dead bodies. Now she just follows Ludendorff.
Cut the odd stylized sideways shot of Diana riding the horse.
Cut Wonder Woman randomly riding past her companions so they can say “hey, this way.”
As Diana rides toward Ludendorff, we see him huffing gas for the first time.
Rearranged and tightened up the fight between Ludendorff and Diana. It’s badass now instead of half-assed.
When Ares shows up cut Diana asking, “who’s there?”
Ares says the sword was not the godkiller but cut him saying to Diana, “You are.”
Ares doesn’t say the “I don’t want to fight you” lines. After Diana declines his offer, he now says, “My dear, Diana…” then he causes the explosion.
Trimmed various parts of the end fights between Diana and Ares, removed Dr. Poison as part of the fight.
Steve and his companions do not watch the Ares boss battle and comment on it.
Ending is now the photograph. Slowed down the zoom out and added in some different music from the soundtrack.
Added “Daughter of Themyscira” to end titles.
Changed music for the rolling credits so there are no vocals.
 
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krausfadr

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which are your four favs, Gieferg?
 

Gieferg

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From DCEU - MoS/BvS/ZSJL. I also consider Aquaman to be better than WW (which I've always seen as an overhyped marvel-aping mediocricity).
 
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Wakeupkeo

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Just watched Krausfdr's WW edit. I am a tough critic I know. I review my own edits a TON before release, so I catch almost everything. And most every edit I watch, I'll have a notepad list of issues or errors. And when reviewing new submissions, even more so.

And I know the source material VERY well, having done my own edit, with the icing on the cake being that I have a completely different view of the source material, as I thought it was one of the best DCEU entries. Krausfdr had his work cut out for him with me.

I am so happy to report I never picked up the notebook once, Not once. Sure, I had a few artistic mental notes here and there due to perspective, but I didn't pick up the notepad once. Technically great. (I did notice more graininess on the highs, particularly on the final fight with the lightning, but nothing major.)

Narratively, I may not agree with everything, like cutting Charlie's character arc a bit, or leaving in "Dear Diana" just before Ares blow up the tower (it might be more ominous without the line, as it sounds like he is about to say more) but minor quibbles due to artistic POV I am sure.

A submission this clean is absolutely refreshing. Easily approved. Congratulations Krausfdr!
 
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PanExis

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OK, I watched it just a couple of days ago, so here's my first impressions:

1) The introduction part, up until the departure from Themyscira, is almost perfection. Things I particularly appreciated were the removal of some of the cringey parts of kid Diana, the knitting of the scenes together (meeting Antiope on their way to see the Godkiller instead of having Diana meet her mother after she jumped of a cliff was ingenious) and especially trimming down the Lasso of Hestia interrogation scene. That scene in its original form reeks of modern Hollywood screenwriting, in my opinion. It's supposed to depict a serious situation where stern Amazons interrogate a potential foe, but Steve ends up acting like a buffoon, supposedly because he tries to resist, blowing up the scene's momentum to pieces. Seeing that you fixed that was really satisfying!

2) The London bits were the cringiest of the original film for me. Between Diana's extreme naivety, Etta's antiques and the introduction of the not-so-formidable team of Steve Trevor, my eyes hurt when I first watched it in the theatre. In this edit, some of the cringe goes away while some other remains. It's a matter of personal taste, after all, and I acknowledge that it would be impossible to remove all of it without compromising the story, so no complaints here. It's a vast improvement over the original, anyway.

3) The ending, however, while technically well-done, was a letdown narratively compared to the rest of the edit. There's a number of things which bothered me there, mainly:
a) Diana's breakdown did not, eventually, work for me without the destruction of Veld. It came out too suddenly and out of the blue for her to act that way just because Steve stopped her from murdering Ludendorff in the party.
b) The mystery of Dr. Maru's notebook. Yes, it is implied in the final confrontation that Ares helped her finish the formula, but I felt that it came too late here. During my watch I caught myself wondering 'what if I didn't know that Maru was able to finish her formula because Ares magically pushed some papers right in front of her? Isn’t her notebook that crucial as we’re told? How did she manage to achieve it without it? Is this a plot-hole?'
c) A minor point, but Ludendorff ends up inhaling a double dose of his tonic a little pointlessly, the first dose resulting in nothing more than hurling a stove. The original sequence makes more sense to me: Diana surprises Ludendorff, he tries to kill her with conventional means and fails. Tries to flee and as Diana catches up with him, he turns to unconventional means -Maru’s special gas- which gives him the strength to fight back.

Please keep in mind that all of my comments above are made with all due respect to your hard work and represent only my point of view.

PS. I get that you’re German-speaking, so have you ever thought of replacing the original dialogue with the German dub whenever Germans are speaking? It happens that I’m currently working on an edit of the film myself and I’ve listened to some of the German dub. The actor who dubs Ludendorff does a fantastic job in mimicking Danny Huston’s voice, so I think it would be possible to switch seamlessly between the dub and the original according to whom he is speaking to.
 

Gieferg

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That dub part - it is generally a good idea, worked very well with broken polish lines in X-Men Apocalypse, so I imagine it may works good here too.
 

krausfadr

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That dub idea is a good one especially in parts where there’s no close up of the mouths moving. Im happy with the overall outcome of this edit though narratively. The slightly hurried ride into Act 3 is an ok trade off for me given the alternative of WW crying in the gas. And unless I can come up with some mind blowing VFX to make it look like WW is amidst victims dying in the gas, I’ll leave it all as-is.
 
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