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My Year with Godzilla

bionicbob

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This seemed like a good companion piece to Garp's reviews...

http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8czak8Kaq3A[/video]
 

Garp

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BONUS: 'Pacific Rim' [2013]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Homage to kaiju films

I decided to place 'Pacific Rim' here in my watch list as I'd read somewhere that it was a pseudo-update of 'Destroy All Monsters'. It's not, but I can see where whoever wrote that was coming from.

Kaiju exist. Earth has been battling them for years, mostly unsuccessfully, until the Jaeger program is birthed. A united worldwide effort, these giant robots, operated inside by at least two mind-linked humans, keep the peace. However, spectacular defeats give the world's governments pause and the Jaeger program is mostly shelved. When the new coastal wall program also begins to fail, it is up to the outdated Jaegers and their ragtag operators to save the day.

I remember watching this film shortly after it came out on DVD in my modest home cinema. At the time I thought it was big flashy nonsense, but entertaining nonetheless. After watching it now, with a few original kaiju films under my belt, I still think it's big flashy nonsense. But it's big flashy nonsense with a heart.

Del Toro managed a deft feat by producing a film that both celebrates the tone of Toho's monster movies but doesn't take them too seriously nor mocks them. It's to his credit that he doesn't stoop to parody here but still understands that he's making a big dumb fun movie.

The human characters are fine, albeit cliched. There are perhaps too many unnecessary back stories explaining their motivations for being involved in the Jaeger program, which results in the film being longer than it needs to be. It's clear as each character is introduced which ones won't survive, which ones will pair off and which jerk will be redeemed by the end, but it's all par for this type of film.

The kaiju designs owe a debt to both Godzilla & Gamera's foes, as far as I could tell, though mostly they were shown in a way that it was hard to be sure. Being titled 'Pacific Rim', it's no surprise that most of the attacks occur in or near water, but nighttime scenes with inclement weather (plus the quick cuts) made it difficult to discern what was going on. Still, the effects were impressive, no doubt. Equally well done was the world-building here, with some practical consideration given to what a world where giant monsters exist would look like.

'Pacific Rim' is miles apart from the kaiju films of old in terms of effects yet wears it's love for those movies on its sleeve. Big flashy nonsense? I think so. But I can live with that.
 

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BONUS: 'Pacific Rim: Uprising' [2018]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Sequel to kaiju homage

It's rare for a sequel to surpass the original. 'Pacific Rim: Uprising' is no exception.

Ten years have passed since the defeat of the Precursors, the alien overlords of the kaiju. Stacker Pentecost's son Jake (John Boyega) is reluctantly recruited into the Pan Pacific Defense Corps to instruct new Jaeger operators, just in case. Of course, a new threat emerges, thrusting Jake and his rookies front and center in another battle to save the earth.

'Pacific Rim: Uprising' utilizes some of the original cast from its predecessor - Charlie Day, Burn Gorman and Rinko Kikuchi - to ground the film to the same universe, yet it still doesn't quite work. The world-building that Del Toro set up is ignored here, and the film feels flatter for it. There are more Jaeger-on-Jaeger battles than kaiju moments, and the young, green team makes the film seem like a cross between 'Transformers' and 'Ender's Game'. John Boyega, whom I had only seen in his most recognisable role previously, manages to hold the film together with his charisma, but it's not enough.

There are plenty of whizz-bang moments, and the effects are very good, so I'm not sure why they didn't resonate with me as much as the original film. It's the same feeling I had after watching 'Independence Day: Resurgence'. It's cool to spend some time with these characters again, but you just can't catch lightning in a bottle twice. 'Pacific Rim: Uprising' is still big flashy nonsense, but it's heart, unfortunately, beats for the lucrative Chinese market instead.
 

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BONUS: 'Atlantic Rim' [2013]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Rip-off of a homage to kaiju films.

Is there any point trashing an Asylum film? They make no pretense to be anything other than they are: cheap rip-offs of popular movies. Still, I feel it is my duty to warn anyone who stumbles across this film accidentally that it is not very good.

Kaiju who lay eggs in crude oil and sea water hatch, first taking out oil rigs before heading for land. Giant robots are summoned to stop them. Sub-par shenanigans ensue.

I can suffer a lot when it comes to films deemed less than worthy. I can stand poor effects. I can put up with cheap sets. I can even let slide inane dialogue. But I just can't stomach bad acting. Thus, 'Atlantic Rim' made me nauseous. Is it so difficult to find actors willing to appear in these films that they have to drag people off the street? I realise I'm watching a film about giant sea monsters battling giant robots, yet my disbelief shouldn't be stretched by wondering whether the actors were making up their lines as they went along.

The effects are up to computer game standards, and the film itself felt like I was watching a video game walkthrough. The plot is simplistic with various objectives scattered throughout: find the lost oil rig, boss battle the kaiju, rescue the girl from the burning building, help Red escape from the brig, etc. Actually, as a game it might have worked, but it makes for a piss-poor film.

I watched this film via Vudu's 'Free with ads' promotion, and discovered that 15 minutes or more could save me 15% off my car insurance. So it wasn't a completely wasted afternoon.
 

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Film 19 - Destroy All Monsters

Spoiler: not all the monsters were destroyed.

3.5/5
 

Garp

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I
Neglify said:
Film 19 - Destroy All Monsters

Spoiler: not all the monsters were destroyed.

3.5/5

I love your one-liner reviews but this might be my favorite.
 

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BONUS: 'Atlantic Rim: Resurrection' [2018]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Sequel to a rip-off of a homage to kaiju films

I can't believe I watched two Asylum films in one day. I feel I need a shower.

New kaiju. New robots. New cast. Same old dreck.

'Atlantic Rim: Resurrection' starts with a brief recap of the previous film, for those who had the good sense to skip it, and then introduces a whole slew of new characters with the same intent - to stop the next round of kaiju with giant robots. The acting is marginally better here, but it is a fine distinction. The effects are no better, no worse, and the screen gets crowded when the film takes a turn towards 'Starship Troopers' territory.

Blah blah blah. The filmmakers made little effort with this one and so I don't feel the need to either. Obviously skip it.
 

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Week 20: 'Ebirah, Horror of the Deep' AKA 'Godzilla versus the Sea Monster' [1966]
Is Godzilla in it? Yes.
Sub or Dub? Sub

Sshhh! The Monsters are sleeping...

In a bizarre series of coincidences and unbelievable outcomes (including a three-day dance marathon!), a group of 4 men find themselves washed ashore an island after being attacked by a giant lobster. The island is home to James-Bond-type villains called the Red Bamboo who are manufacturing heavy water for reasons unknown but probably nefarious. They have also enslaved natives from Infant Island to concoct a yellow liquid to keep Ebirah (the afore-mentioned giant lobster) at bay. However, unknown to Red Bamboo, Godzilla has also chosen the same island for his naptime. Can our heroes awaken the snoring behemoth, or will Daiyo (Kumi Mizuno), the beautiful native girl, be able to summon the similarly slumbering Mothra to save the slaves, defeat the bad guys and rescue all?

This was Jun Fukuda's first Godzilla film, and it's... OK. Like 'Dogora', it's as though he didn't really want to make a Godzilla film, but wanted to make a hip 60s action-spy-thriller instead. Yes, there are kaiju here, with more screen time than 'Dogora' allowed, but they almost seem to be afterthoughts. Godzilla is pretty sedentary and barely active. The battles are part comic, with a strange football match occurring between him & Ebirah (1966, as every Brit knows, was a World Cup year).

Mothra returns, as do two new twin fairies, less creepy than their counterparts. There's also a giant condor, who could be some relation to Rodan, or could just be, you know, a giant condor. Either way it doesn't matter, as it's swiftly dealt with, leaving me to wonder why it was there at all. In fact, a lot of this film left me wondering, as the plot doesn't make a whole lot of sense, even by Toho standards. And, again, they try to stop Godzilla with electrical cables! Have you people never seen a Godzilla film before? Come on.

Is it entertaining? Yeah, I suppose. Some of the models are excellent, notably Ebirah's attack on the yacht. The acting is fine, no one really coming out on top, and Kumi Mizuno is lovely to look at. The hip 60s vibe added a lot to any fun I obtained from this viewing, but I was hoping for more.
 

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BONUS: 'The X from Outer Space' [1967]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Shochiku Studio's answer to Godzilla
Sub or Dub? Sub

Sometime in the future, astronauts are sent to Mars in the hope that they can figure out why other spaceships sent to Mars keep getting lost (nice gig). En route, their ship is bombarded with spores, one of which they decide to bring back to Earth because, hey, what's the worse that could happen? Shockingly, the spore is not harmless and grows into a Space Thing that attacks Japan. Chaos and shaving foam erupts.

This is a solid effort by Shochiku Studios to jump on the Kaiju bandwagon. The effects are so hit and miss, though, that it's almost as if two different crews were working on them. The models for the rockets and space stations are pretty good - very 'Thunderbirds' looking - but the Space Monster suit is terrible, up there with 'The Giant Claw'. What is it supposed to be?

The film is also split, with the first half being an entertaining though not greatly action-packed Day in the Life of Future Astronauts. There's conflict amongst the crew, due to the seemingly irresistible charm of Captain Sano (Toshiya Wazaki) and the two women who pine for him (Itoko Harada and Peggy Neal). This subplot doesn't really add anything or go anywhere, but offers some awkward pauses, sideways glances and snubs.

When 'X' turns up (named Guilala here; apparently there was a competition to name him. Maybe you had to watch the film to see if you'd won) he doesn't waste any time laying waste to Japan. He bounces around the coast with abandon, drawn, like Godzilla and Gamera before him, to dams and power stations. Again, the effects of his destruction are below Toho's efforts and are hampered by the fact that Guilala looks bloody stupid.

I don't normally like giving away the ending, but just be prepared for a lot of shaving foam in the climax. That's all. I've already said too much.

'The X from Outer Space' is not a terrible movie, but with a little less effort it could have been. Nice try, Shochiku, nice try.

P.S. Shochiku spent so much of their budget on the effects, I believe, that they could only afford a cheesy jazz combo from a cruise ship to perform the score. So sad.
 

Garp

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BONUS: 'Monster X Strikes Back: Attack the G8 Summit' [2008]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Sequel to Shochiku's answer to Godzilla
Sub or Dub? Sub

Guilala returns in this 2008 satirical comedy which pokes fun at political leaders and their response to global threats. Is it an allegory for Climate Change or International Terrorism? I don't know, but it's relatively entertaining all the same.

A meteorite crashes into Japan during the G8 Summit, and Guilala emerges, bent once again on mindless destruction. The world leaders take turns to devise a plan to dispose of the giant threat, with repeatedly dismal results. Meanwhile, two reporters come across a small village whose inhabitants seem to have a link to Guilala. Will the elected leaders of the free world actually do something useful, or do the small band of villagers already hold the key to the Monster X problem?

Utilizing a kaiju scenario to produce a satirical parody is a good idea and works in parts, but the comedy is too broad to be a complete success. The caricatures of the world leaders are also less than subtle, with Japan's Prime Minister getting the worst of it, unsurprisingly, suffering diarrhea throughout the film. French President Sarkozy is presented as a philanderer, more interested in getting it on with a beautiful Japanese translator, and Germany's Chancellor Angela Merkel is constantly on guard against sexism. Even North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il gets a look in, adding to the 'Team America: World Police' vibe.

There are a couple of genuinely funny moments. A cute kid, complete with giant multi-coloured lollipop, suddenly appears amongst the world leaders to give the monster a name and to add his thoughts on how to stop him, taking a playful jab at the child-friendly Godzilla and Gamera movies. Also, whom I assumed to be well-known Japanese celebrities were interviewed documentary-style about the Guilala threat, with one being excited that a monster had finally appeared but disappointed that it wasn't Varan or Baragon.

The Guilala suit appeared exactly the same, for better or worse, though most of the footage was recycled from the original film. Captain Sano, now a doctor, also reappears in a cameo, though Natsuki Kato as the intrepid reporter draws the eye. She is gorgeous and keeps the sub-plot from dragging the film down.

Overall it's a good idea that falls flat more often than it soars.
 

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Film 20 - Ebirah, Horror of the Deep AKA Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster

I think those little pixie twins gave everybody crabs.

2.5/5
 

Garp

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Week 21: 'All Monsters Attack' AKA 'Godzilla's Revenge' [1969]
Is Godzilla in it? Yes
Sub or Dub? Sub

Since I first read about this film, during the early stages of my Godzilla research, I've been dreading the week I would force myself to sit down and watch it. Although it wasn't quite as bad as I expected, it is nevertheless a low point for Toho and Ishiro Honda.

Ichiro is a young boy whose parents work long hours, leaving him alone with just his wild imagination and undiagnosed narcolepsy for company. Ichiro is being picked on by Gabera, the leader of a kids gang. In his dreams, Ichiro visits Monster Island and is befriended by a talking Minilla, who is also being bullied by his own Gabera, a lanky kaiju. Meanwhile, two thieves hide out in an abandoned factory close to Ichiro's home. When Ichiro is kidnapped by the thieves, he must use the skills and bravery he learnt on Monster Island to escape.

If anything is going to turn me off a kaiju film, it's child actors and stock footage. 'All Monsters Attack' features both in abundance. Still, Tomonori Yazaki, who plays Ichiro, actually isn't too annoying, and director Honda at least steals mostly exciting footage from earlier films. However, in doing so, you get the impression that Godzilla spends his free time on Monster Island looking for other kaiju to beat up. Kamacuras, Ebirah, Kumonga and the Giant Condor all get a good kicking from Godzilla in swift succession. In the meantime, Minilla, who here has the gift of speech, is pestered by his 'father' to fight Gabera, a really sorry-looking kaiju. Gabera is some kind of dragon with a feline face and a shock of red hair; it's embarrassing.

After Ichiro is kidnapped, the film becomes an early version of 'Home Alone' as he outwits the robbers and - spoiler - brings them to justice. As a child, I probably would have lapped this stuff up - monster fights and a kid hero outsmarting grown-ups - but even the kid in me couldn't muster up much enthusiasm for this film.

One thing about this film that I found interesting and saved it from being dismissed entirely is that Ichiro comes from a decidedly working class background. His father drives a train and his mother seems to work at a hotel, both forced to work overtime for the extra income. Their apartment is small and, by the looks of things, not in the nicest part of town, with abandoned buildings nearby deemed ideal for bank robbers. This verisimilitude in a fantasy film took it up a few notches for me, for what it's worth.
 

bionicbob

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Will you be reviewing this....?

http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gx4Ips3B9c0[/video]

While still very flawed, I thought it was superior to the movie it was based on.... though not sure if that says much?  :p
 

Garp

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bionicbob said:
Will you be reviewing this....?

Yes, in mid-September, if I keep to my schedule. I saw the film when it came out, though I don't remember much about it (maybe just as well, according to reviews). I don't recall ever seeing this, though. My local library has the complete series on DVD, but I'll probably just watch a handful, like the other cartoon series.
 

Jrzag42

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All Monsters Attack! I remember that one! I completely forgot what it was called!
 

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BONUS: 'Gamera vs. Guiron' [1969]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Daiei's answer to Godzilla
Sub or Dub? Sub

Child actors and stock footage. This was not my week for good kaiju movies.

Two annoying kids find a spaceship and are whisked away to a mysterious planet (which they confusingly keep referring to as a star) on the opposite side to our sun. They are befriended by two female aliens who not only control the monster Guiron but also are keen to sample the annoying kids' brains. Unfortunately, this interesting turn of events is curtailed. Meanwhile, Gamera spends a long time upside-down underwater.

'Gamera vs. Guiron' borrows liberally from the previous year's 'Gamera vs. Viras', with two boy protagonists (one Japanese, one American), evil space aliens (even their glowing eyes are the same) and remote-controlled monsters. Granted, 'Viras' was no masterpiece, but I'd take it any day over this rubbish.

First off, the kid actors are terrible, Christopher Murphy as Tom especially so. The special effects go beyond 'minimal' to plain 'cheap', with the spaceship's interior looking like the kid actors put it together themselves. The only plus - and it's still a stretch to call it that - is the iconic look of Guiron with his blade-shaped head. His battle with 'Space Gyaos' (ie. the original Gyaos spray-painted silver) is over-the-top gory as he slices off Gyaos' limbs one by one in a scene that will no doubt bring to mind the Black Knight from 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail' to anyone watching. Not content to leaving him crippled, he decapitates him then begins to slash the hapless creature into slices like some deli meat.

The scene in which the aliens drug the boys is also problematic. They shave Akio's head, produce a small rotating saw and begin discussing where to cut off his skull to get to his raw brain. I can imagine many a parent shifting uncomfortably in their seat, mentally calculating the cost of years of therapy that their traumatized children will have to endure.

Oh, and Gamera's in this too, of course. He spouts a lot of turquoise blood, the result of Guiron shooting shurikens from his head, and ends up unconscious. In a lake. Upside-down. For ages. Meanwhile, we get to watch some of his previous exploits from other films as a reminder that he's a friend to all children. Or maybe just to pad out the runtime, who can say?

If there is any reason to see this film, it is for Guiron, who deserves to be in a better film than this. But I still wouldn't recommend watching this. Just seek out the Guiron vs Gyaos clip on YouTube and feel happy in the knowledge that you've saved yourself over a hour or torture. And maybe years of therapy.
 

asterixsmeagol

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Syfy Wire said:
With Godzilla: King of the Monsters looming and a long weekend ahead of you, you may have the inclination to watch a Godzilla movie or two or 30. But where would you start? There's so many of them, and until we get a streaming service that's solely devoted to radioactive creatures, I doubt we'll be able to find them all in one place.

Well, worry no more, hypothetical but completely normal Godzilla fanatic, for I have compiled a list of every Godzilla movie and all the places that you can watch them. For the most part, they're spread out over the Criterion Channel (fingers crossed for a sweet Criterion Collection Godzilla box set!), and Amazon (for free if you have a STARZ membership,) but there's also a few on Netflix, Vudu, and of course, Google Play.

Links in article
 

The Scribbling Man

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Hoping that Criterion channel comes to the UK eventually...
 

Neglify

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Psst... a good amount of them are public domain and available at The Internet Archive (which is actually located in San Francisco, one of the cities that Godzilla 2014 filmed in).
 

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BONUS: 'Gamera vs. Jiger' [1970]
Is Godzilla in it? No. Godzilla connection: Daiei's answer to Godzilla
Sub or Dub? Sub

'Gamera vs. Jiger' threatens to derail itself right from the outset with a selection of footage from previous Gamera films playing over the opening credits. Fortunately, those are the only non-original clips we see, and the film progresses to be one of the better Gamera outings.

The film starts as a mini-commercial for the Japanese World's Fair, Expo 70, the setting for most of this film. We get to see the various pavilions and it all looks like a very nice place to visit. Well done, Daiei, for showcasing it.

There is a lot of plot in this film, and I am bound to miss some of it, but the basic story involves the relocation of an ancient statue from Wester Island to the Expo. Legend states that a curse will reign down upon whomsoever moves it, releasing Jiger. And, don't you know it, that's exactly what happens.

Jiger is a mixed bag of a kaiju. On the one hand, the suit looks good, even close up, but it's far from an iconic figure, being rather nondescript. Her (for Jiger is most certainly a she) special powers involve shooting spikes from her tusks and emitting a kind of heat ray from her back, destroying city blocks and turning hapless soldiers into skeletons (a pretty good effect). In fact, 'Gamera vs. Jiger' looks like there was some money spent here, with more extras, better effects and more elaborate settings.

The film sticks with the formula of pairing Japanese and Western boys as the main protagonists, but they are slightly older and act a little better. Also returning is the mini yellow submarine from 'Gamera vs. Viras', which is utilized in a 'Fantastic Voyage' type sequence, as the boys enter Gamera's body. It doesn't really make sense but it somehow works within this film.

'Gamera vs. Jiger' moves quickly, not letting you pause to think about how ridiculous it really is, and is enjoyable if you're in the mood for something fun and non-demanding.
 
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