matrixgrindhouse
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Jumping on the Star Wars ranking bandwagon - from best to worst:
The Empire Strikes Back: Probably my favorite movie of all time, Star Wars or otherwise. An unparalleled classic, I love everything about it.
A New Hope: Another true classic, it does have a few rough edges, but nothing that would diminish it in my eyes. It's biggest fault is "not being as good as Empire", which can be said of most movies as far as I'm concerned. Love it.
Rogue One: I loved the style, the characters, the story, the action, the fanservice, the new stuff - this is exactly what I wanted out of a spinoff like this. A better prequel than any of the real prequels, it does a phenomenal job of leading in to the originals - and surprisingly, throwing a few bones to the prequels themselves. I wish we'd gotten to know some of the characters better - Bodhi really got the short end of the screentime stick. Needs more Donnie Yen, but again, I'd say that for most movies. Stylistically, it made Star Wars feel real, and that's a tricky task. And the music was top notch - which I didn't think would be possible without John Williams's involvement. Giacchino really impressed me.
The Force Awakens: yes, this is primarily constructed from recycled materials. But it assembles these components magnificently. The new major characters introduced are all very likable (or the appropriate inverse for Kylo Ren). They feel like worthy heroes and villains to carry on the legacy of the saga. That it's able to do this while also giving classic returning figures plenty of time to rekindle old familiar feelings is another admirable achievement. A good mix of old and new, but it all feels familiar - usually in the right ways. The only aspect that I think they took too far in terms of rehash is the planetary designs. They're all carbon copies of existing worlds, visually speaking. So much so that I was 100% convinced that Hosnian was Coruscant after my first viewing, and that does dramatically change the context of a very important scene. The cinematography is glorious, probably my favorite in the series from the visual perspective.
Return of the Jedi: My ten year old self would hate me for putting this so low. But roll with me - there's a lot I still love about this one. The high points are the highest of the entire series. The speeder bike chase, the battle of Endor, and everything that happens between Luke, Vader, and the Emperor are some of my favorite things in all of Star Wars. But watching it as an adult, and a much more seasoned film viewer - this movie has problems. The stuff at Jabba's palace goes on too long, and gets a bit too goofy for my liking in places (let alone that horrendous musical number in the Special Edition - I'm talking theatrical, to be clear). The Ewoks - I don't know what George was thinking. If he wants to inject adorable teddy bears into his movie, okay, sure. But why involve them in the climactic battle between good and evil? I can believe the "technologically inferior guerilla force triumphs over heavily armed space fascists" without any suspension of disbelief. But when Ewoks start getting blown away, I'm just left scratching my head. "See kids? The adorable teddy bear people can die horrifically, just like everyone else." There's a lot of mood whiplash in this one. Lando has nothing to do after Han's rescue. Really, would the space battle have played out any differently if it were Han and Chewie in the Falcon? Dramatically, I think it'd have been better if Lando died during Han's rescue, redeeming himself fully for his betrayal. As for Han - boy oh boy, Harrison Ford did not want to be there. His performance is really phoned in, and it shows. Still - the great stuff more than makes up for its faults. I still love watching it. But there's a lot better in the series now.
The Last Jedi:
Revenge of the Sith: The best of the prequels, it's the closest Lucas came to recapturing the old magic. It's still got most of the same problems - bad dialogue aplenty, an overly artificial look to thinks, Hayden's acting. But it's got the most redeeming qualities of any of this trilogy. Palpatine's final rise to power, the extermination of the Jedi, Anakin's dark deeds, his duel with Obi-Wan, that haunting shot of the mask lowering over his face - basically any time the characters keep their mouths shut, it's able to evoke some real emotional reactions from me. And the lightsaber choreography is mostly great, as per usual. I think my biggest gripe with this one is Anakin's characterization. He's made out to be more of a tragic, even gullible figure, rather than a true seduction to the dark side as we had been told so long before.
Attack of the Clones: I dunno. It's almost everyone's least favorite nowadays, but I still think it's a huge improvement over The Phantom Menace. I guess I'd rather be bored and mildly amused than irritated. The romantic dialogue is laughable, the plot disjointed and incoherent in places. But it has that wonderful chase scene, that fun asteroid dog fight, and screw it: I love Yoda's fight scene. Anakin's search for his mother, followed by his violent retribution: that's some powerful imagery to me. It's not a good movie, but it's got stuff I really like contained within.
The Phantom Menace: Jar Jar Binks is the worst character in any movie I've ever seen, his constant antics bring my blood to a boil. Awful, awful, awful decision, one that actively sucks the enjoyment out of many scenes. Young Anakin isn't much better. I refuse to accept that even at his most innocent, that Darth Vader ever said "yipee" or considered spinning to be "a neat trick". The plot is uninspiring, beyond Palpatine's manipulation. The Trade Federation are pathetic villains. Darth Maul is a cool action figure, but a dramatically bankrupt character. Introducing this prophecy, this notion that Darth Vader was believed to be a messianic figure is a baffling element. Midichlorians bug me to no end. The Force worked best when it was magic. A mysterious energy, subject to religious dedication and agnostic disbelief alike. When you're able to give someone a blood test, and assign some sort of quantified number related to their potential - that just kills that entire concept for me. There's some decent action beats - the final lightsaber fight is phenomenal, to be sure. Liam Neeson does his best to save the movie - any scene where Qui Gon shares words of wisdom are the closest we get to classic Star Wars character interaction. There's bits and pieces that I enjoy, but this is not an enjoyable viewing experience overall.
The Clone Wars (Animated, 2008): It's like they distilled the absolute worst parts of the prequels, and dumbed them down more. I know this one was meant for children, but damnit, kids cartoons don't have to treat their audience with this little respect for their intelligence. I'm not a fan of the art style, either. No redeeming qualities whatsoever in this one.
The Holiday Special: Prolonged viewing should be banned by a number of international treaties. This is straight up torture.
The Empire Strikes Back: Probably my favorite movie of all time, Star Wars or otherwise. An unparalleled classic, I love everything about it.
A New Hope: Another true classic, it does have a few rough edges, but nothing that would diminish it in my eyes. It's biggest fault is "not being as good as Empire", which can be said of most movies as far as I'm concerned. Love it.
Rogue One: I loved the style, the characters, the story, the action, the fanservice, the new stuff - this is exactly what I wanted out of a spinoff like this. A better prequel than any of the real prequels, it does a phenomenal job of leading in to the originals - and surprisingly, throwing a few bones to the prequels themselves. I wish we'd gotten to know some of the characters better - Bodhi really got the short end of the screentime stick. Needs more Donnie Yen, but again, I'd say that for most movies. Stylistically, it made Star Wars feel real, and that's a tricky task. And the music was top notch - which I didn't think would be possible without John Williams's involvement. Giacchino really impressed me.
The Force Awakens: yes, this is primarily constructed from recycled materials. But it assembles these components magnificently. The new major characters introduced are all very likable (or the appropriate inverse for Kylo Ren). They feel like worthy heroes and villains to carry on the legacy of the saga. That it's able to do this while also giving classic returning figures plenty of time to rekindle old familiar feelings is another admirable achievement. A good mix of old and new, but it all feels familiar - usually in the right ways. The only aspect that I think they took too far in terms of rehash is the planetary designs. They're all carbon copies of existing worlds, visually speaking. So much so that I was 100% convinced that Hosnian was Coruscant after my first viewing, and that does dramatically change the context of a very important scene. The cinematography is glorious, probably my favorite in the series from the visual perspective.
Return of the Jedi: My ten year old self would hate me for putting this so low. But roll with me - there's a lot I still love about this one. The high points are the highest of the entire series. The speeder bike chase, the battle of Endor, and everything that happens between Luke, Vader, and the Emperor are some of my favorite things in all of Star Wars. But watching it as an adult, and a much more seasoned film viewer - this movie has problems. The stuff at Jabba's palace goes on too long, and gets a bit too goofy for my liking in places (let alone that horrendous musical number in the Special Edition - I'm talking theatrical, to be clear). The Ewoks - I don't know what George was thinking. If he wants to inject adorable teddy bears into his movie, okay, sure. But why involve them in the climactic battle between good and evil? I can believe the "technologically inferior guerilla force triumphs over heavily armed space fascists" without any suspension of disbelief. But when Ewoks start getting blown away, I'm just left scratching my head. "See kids? The adorable teddy bear people can die horrifically, just like everyone else." There's a lot of mood whiplash in this one. Lando has nothing to do after Han's rescue. Really, would the space battle have played out any differently if it were Han and Chewie in the Falcon? Dramatically, I think it'd have been better if Lando died during Han's rescue, redeeming himself fully for his betrayal. As for Han - boy oh boy, Harrison Ford did not want to be there. His performance is really phoned in, and it shows. Still - the great stuff more than makes up for its faults. I still love watching it. But there's a lot better in the series now.
The Last Jedi:
I liked watching it. It made me feel emotions. It surprised me many times. It's a pretty good movie, but it's an awful sequel. Utterly unconcerned with building up elements introduced in the previous film, it dismisses and dispenses with lots of the mysteries, and squanders tons of potential in the process. I don't buy Luke's characterization. Rose isn't made to be half as interesting as the wonderful characters introduced one year prior. The Canto Bight subplot is pointless, and very out of place. Finn had next to nothing worthwhile to do. Lots of things make no sense whatsoever when given thought. There's tons of Marvel style humor, injected everywhere, and constantly. Some of it is admittedly very funny, but the sheer deluge of jokes and inappropriate moments really rubs me the wrong way. The movie's tone and themes often strike me as overly cynical, especially when it comes to the concept of what heroism is. I don't think this movie ruined Star Wars, but it did send things veering off course. It'll take some masterful writing to stick the landing and make the end of this trilogy satisfying. I expect this one will rise or fall in future rankings, once Episode IX is taken into consideration. For now, I consider it to be a good movie, but one bogged down by a lot of things that I hated. In time, I may wind up re-evaluating it as a bad movie elevated by some truly great moments.
Revenge of the Sith: The best of the prequels, it's the closest Lucas came to recapturing the old magic. It's still got most of the same problems - bad dialogue aplenty, an overly artificial look to thinks, Hayden's acting. But it's got the most redeeming qualities of any of this trilogy. Palpatine's final rise to power, the extermination of the Jedi, Anakin's dark deeds, his duel with Obi-Wan, that haunting shot of the mask lowering over his face - basically any time the characters keep their mouths shut, it's able to evoke some real emotional reactions from me. And the lightsaber choreography is mostly great, as per usual. I think my biggest gripe with this one is Anakin's characterization. He's made out to be more of a tragic, even gullible figure, rather than a true seduction to the dark side as we had been told so long before.
Attack of the Clones: I dunno. It's almost everyone's least favorite nowadays, but I still think it's a huge improvement over The Phantom Menace. I guess I'd rather be bored and mildly amused than irritated. The romantic dialogue is laughable, the plot disjointed and incoherent in places. But it has that wonderful chase scene, that fun asteroid dog fight, and screw it: I love Yoda's fight scene. Anakin's search for his mother, followed by his violent retribution: that's some powerful imagery to me. It's not a good movie, but it's got stuff I really like contained within.
The Phantom Menace: Jar Jar Binks is the worst character in any movie I've ever seen, his constant antics bring my blood to a boil. Awful, awful, awful decision, one that actively sucks the enjoyment out of many scenes. Young Anakin isn't much better. I refuse to accept that even at his most innocent, that Darth Vader ever said "yipee" or considered spinning to be "a neat trick". The plot is uninspiring, beyond Palpatine's manipulation. The Trade Federation are pathetic villains. Darth Maul is a cool action figure, but a dramatically bankrupt character. Introducing this prophecy, this notion that Darth Vader was believed to be a messianic figure is a baffling element. Midichlorians bug me to no end. The Force worked best when it was magic. A mysterious energy, subject to religious dedication and agnostic disbelief alike. When you're able to give someone a blood test, and assign some sort of quantified number related to their potential - that just kills that entire concept for me. There's some decent action beats - the final lightsaber fight is phenomenal, to be sure. Liam Neeson does his best to save the movie - any scene where Qui Gon shares words of wisdom are the closest we get to classic Star Wars character interaction. There's bits and pieces that I enjoy, but this is not an enjoyable viewing experience overall.
The Clone Wars (Animated, 2008): It's like they distilled the absolute worst parts of the prequels, and dumbed them down more. I know this one was meant for children, but damnit, kids cartoons don't have to treat their audience with this little respect for their intelligence. I'm not a fan of the art style, either. No redeeming qualities whatsoever in this one.
The Holiday Special: Prolonged viewing should be banned by a number of international treaties. This is straight up torture.