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Book Reviews
#41
Zombie Love by Ray Garton

[Image: iokt1w.jpg]

Been buying Ray Garton for years, always hoping he would write his way back to the glory, gory era of Live Girls, Lot Lizards, and New Neighbor.
Splatter seems like a long time ago now, the punks aged and were supplanted by Eddie Lee and others of that ilk whose shock crutch was often cousin lovin’.

Zombie Love begins with three teens visiting the creepy old lady on the town outskirts.
The main character’s girlfriend recently died in an auto mishap, and they were hoping - maybe - that the old lady - if she were actually a witch - might be able to - “so something.”
She gives him a bottle of goo, tells him to rub it on the corpse, say some words, and whatever happens will be his responsibility.
Hardly original. Basic plot from “Monkey’s Paw” to Deadly Friend.
Quick read. Wickedly funny in the middle, copped out ending.

The wicked bit - not for prudes.


Of course the girlfriend gets revived. Yet, she is still dead.
Reference the title. Zombie!
Being teens, they make frequent stupid ass assumptions.
The boyfriend hides dead girl in the family poolhouse, goes to his room to sleep, thinking he’ll come up with a plan tomorrow.
Middle of the night, he wakes to his girlfriend straddling him, grinding away.
Dead or not, her primal instincts run strong, and his bedroom window was conveniently open.
Of course, she is dead and rotting, so along with love juices flowing from the temple of doom are also entrails. How will he explain those poor sheets when Mom washes laundry?
Lengthy passages describing the fragrance issuing from her portal are omitted here.
Another great scene is when the friends are taking her out for her daily stroll through the park.
She is fast and loose pets make fresh meals. So do unattended babies. Unhappy meals.
After one fast food feast, zombie girl’s face is smeared in blood so the teen friends wipe her clean with a tissue.
Except her nose falls off in their hands.
Without the nose, her sunglasses won’t stay on. There goes her disguise!
Book is howlingly funny in the mid section, before yielding to a tired, cliché ridden end.
Perfect example of Garton’s writing trajectory.
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