The Last Movie(s) You Watched... (quick one or two sentence reviews)

[Moe_Syzlak]

To be clear I didn't mean to say this reviewer was in particular cynical, it was just a broad remark about how I feel about this place sometimes. A remark that was in hindsight misplaced no doubt. And that's a mistake on my part and I apologize.

And I didn't even so much as imply the term "shallow", much less did I say it or call anybody that so thanks for putting words in my mouth. Appreciate that.

Casually remarking again that I guess this is a good example that there's a reason I stepped away from being a part of this community, and I'm re affirmed in it now. I'll still release my edits and answer pm requests for them but I think I'm pretty positive that my decision to stop interacting here on the forums was the right one. And that's more of a statement about me than it is you all.

Peace out. You'll hear from me again if I ever release a new edit. And those of you that have me on discord can deal with my stupid thoughts until then. Lol. In the meantime life's just too short. Later.

I quoted the “shallow” because of the response to your criticism, not yours. I was trying to show it goes both ways. But broadly calling the community cynical rather than an individual is a bit better… I guess.

 

[Eyepainter]

To be clear I didn't mean to say this reviewer was in particular cynical, it was just a broad remark about how I feel about this place sometimes. A remark that was in hindsight misplaced no doubt. And that's a mistake on my part and I apologize.

And I didn't even so much as imply the term "shallow", much less did I say it or call anybody that so thanks for putting words in my mouth. Appreciate that.

Casually remarking again that I guess this is a good example that there's a reason I stepped away from being a part of this community, and I'm re affirmed in it now. I'll still release my edits and answer pm requests for them but I think I'm pretty positive that my decision to stop interacting here on the forums was the right one. And that's more of a statement about me than it is you all.

Peace out. You'll hear from me again if I ever release a new edit. And those of you that have me on discord can deal with my stupid thoughts until then. Lol. In the meantime life's just too short. Later.

Well, I'll take responsibility for putting words in your mouth and apologize for that one. It was just that your reply was pretty much "it's not supposed to be deep," and my interpretation was that if it's not deep, then it's supposed to be shallow, and I guess I oversimplified on that one. So, my apologies.

Still, if you feel the place is too cynical, then that's your call. Do whatever's best for you. I deal with cynics the likes of which you wouldn't believe at my customer service job, and it's no fun dealing with those kinds of people all the time. If you feel this community is just gonna make you miserable, I won't try to talk you out of it. As you said, life's too short.

 

[mnkykungfu]

So...gotta coupla One or Two Sentence Movie Reviews here...

Gia (1998)
A film that sadly sits neglected in the HBO Originals while Blonde is proudly displayed on Netflix's home page, Angelina Jolie gives one of her finest performances as breakout supermodel and cautionary tale, Gia Carangi. It's a bit artistic but not overly pretentious, and the rampant nudity and lesbianism will no doubt fill the cheap seats.

Mom and Dad Save the World (1992)
Another one buried by HBO but this time for good reason, this Bill & Ted follow-up suffers from poor directing choices that don't really put the budget up on screen. The campy tone of this sci-fi adventure never really hits home and it ends up looking mostly like C-rate schlock despite the strong cast.

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)
Should it surprise anyone that this doesn't age well? Poor choice for me to come at this 20 years later, but I wasn't that interested in it even at the time of release. After a big, star-studded, meta-humor opening it's mostly downhill for this, though I was excited to see original G4 TV host Diane Mizota in a small, thankless role.

 

[Eyepainter]

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)
Should it surprise anyone that this doesn't age well? Poor choice for me to come at this 20 years later, but I wasn't that interested in it even at the time of release. After a big, star-studded, meta-humor opening it's mostly downhill for this, though I was excited to see original G4 TV host Diane Mizota in a small, thankless role.

To me, the first one remains the best of the lot, and the only one that still holds up. But my criticisms of the sequels are a strange one. The biggest sin of The Spy Who Shagged Me is that the only storyline is about Austin Powers trying to get his mojo back, which isn't enough story for a 90 minute movie. Goldmember's biggest sin is that it has too many plotlines. You have the usual Austin Powers vs Dr. Evil plot. There's Goldmember for plot 2. Then there's Austin and his dad for plot 3. Foxxy Cleopatra, gotta give her a plot. There's a character arc for Mini-Me, that's plot 5. A character arc for Dr. Evil's son, that's plot 6. We even have to follow up on Fat Bastard, making plot 7. Yes. 7 storylines I managed to count in this 1 movie. How is it that the second movie had so much difficulty coming up with a story, while the third one has so much story it leaves you overwhelmed? It's bizarre, and I've never seen that kind of writing phenomenon in any other movie franchise before or after Austin Powers.

It makes me wonder if the behind-the-scenes stuff has any insight into what happened during the pre-production stages of both movies. But since I don't own the sequels, nor want to, I'm probably never going to find out beyond what other people say about it.

 

[kinnikuman]

Circle of iron - cool weird little movie from 1978. I think Bruce lee helped write it. My biggest take away is that the story or philosophies or lore is actually kinda interesting and the action or fighting scenes are horrible. This movie suffers from the never trained in fighting actors just circling each other and throwing ridiculous chops or sweeping kicks that miss by a mile. Not that I love modern fight scenes with the million cuts per minute but they at least hide the flaws of on screen fights. In one particular fight scene you can see a characters wig fall off. I imagine editing was a lot tougher back then because cuts are always jarring or they go a second too long. Anyways it’s on Amazon and as I’m writing this I wonder if the movie can be saved ? Is anyone here a bad enough dude to save this movie ?

 

[mnkykungfu]

I think Bruce lee helped write it. My biggest take away is that the story or philosophies or lore is actually kinda interesting and the action or fighting scenes are horrible.

Yeah, he just wrote the story, but hadn't developed the script yet. He was working on many of the same ideas for Game of Death, this idea of the confrontation of styles and philosophies, but the true battle being inside oneself. He was trying to bring this to an early '70s audience and make it sink in beyond the hippies, and hadn't cracked how to do it well. Then he died and producers took those two film treatments and made crap productions out of them.

Goldmember's biggest sin is that it has too many plotlines.

Having just seen this, I think you're being generous with the words "plot" and "story". lol It's about 90 minutes and hardly has anything like a main plot or story. It's basically just a string of gags, each with a featured character. Reminds me of several of Dana Carvey' and Myers' later live action films, like Master of Disguise or The Love Guru.

 

[kinnikuman]

Yeah, he just wrote the story, but hadn't developed the script yet. He was working on many of the same ideas for Game of Death, this idea of the confrontation of styles and philosophies, but the true battle being inside oneself. He was trying to bring this to an early '70s audience and make it sink in beyond the hippies, and hadn't cracked how to do it well. Then he died and producers took those two film treatments and made crap productions out of them.


Having just seen this, I think you're being generous with the words "plot" and "story". lol It's about 90 minutes and hardly has anything like a main plot or story. It's basically just a string of gags, each with a featured character. Reminds me of several of Dana Carvey' and Myers' later live action films, like Master of Disguise or The Love Guru.

Yeah, this movie had an epic philosophical story mixed with producer input written all over it. There were siddartha elements but also throw away kung fu fights or pointless chase sequences. Eli Wallachs character lives in tub dissolving his lower half so that he can rid himself of the curse of libido - so much potential! I imagine the protagonist was supposed to travel the world learning different philosophies along the way , sometimes maybe fighting if he had to, and ultimately learning the ultimate lesson that all he has to learn is contained within himself. But along the way studios wanted 88 minutes of cheap fights in the desert lol so you and up with this thing 50 percent philosophy 50 percent bad slow fights

 

[mnkykungfu]

I imagine the protagonist was supposed to travel the world learning different philosophies along the way , sometimes maybe fighting if he had to, and ultimately learning the ultimate lesson that all he has to learn is contained within himself.

I saw an interview with Bruce talking about the stories he was working on, and that indeed was pretty much what he said. He kept working at this idea of how to represent conflict on-screen, and wanted to make the physical representation match with a more philosophical or theoretical or meta-physical conflict. So in Way of the Dragon (which he wrote and directed), he has the showdown between him and Norris' character become like the immovable object/irrestible force dilemma. His character has no choice but to (SPOILERS?) uh, permanently end the conflict, which you can see in his eyes he really doesn't want to do. But he knows there's no other way...the guy will simply never stop.
And he kept trying to work at this idea of self-growth and learning from your experiences with others, having to evolve. He tried to portray that a bit in the Game of Death fights, and wanted to show that in his story ideas for Kung Fu - The Series. I think the story in Circle of Iron was perhaps his trippiest, most metaphysical version... which is probably why he had it on the backburner and was working on things easier to execute. Enter the Dragon, for example, got fast-tracked because it was a Hollywood co-production and relatively simple to realize. Bruce fought to put in some philosophical elements so that it wasn't just a straight exploitation film, but those got left on the cutting room floor in the original theatrical cut. I know some people worship that movie, but for me it's one of his least interesting....just has some great action scenes!

 

[Eyepainter]

Having just seen this, I think you're being generous with the words "plot" and "story". lol It's about 90 minutes and hardly has anything like a main plot or story. It's basically just a string of gags, each with a featured character. Reminds me of several of Dana Carvey' and Myers' later live action films, like Master of Disguise or The Love Guru.

Having watched Star Trek V: The Final Frontier and Rocky V recently, I've come to the conclusion that "plot" and "story" is more about how the story is told and executed rather than the actual writing itself. I've seen plenty a movie that was supposedly well-written, but ultimately made for a terrible film. In the case of Goldmember, I only said it had 7 plotlines. I never said the film had a main plot (Of course, that speaks to the failure of the film as a whole).

 

[mnkykungfu]

Contratiempo a.k.a. "The Invisible Guest" (2016)
This Spanish film is very Hitchcockian and surprisingly mostly dark and serious and not as melodramatic as a Latino murder-thriller may often be. Well-filmed and well-directed, this has a couple of plot moments that I had a strong urge to nitpick, but it's probably only a matter of time until there's an American adaptation, so I'll see if they smooth out the wrinkles.

I Heart Huckabees (2004)
I used to somehow always confuse this with other indies like Because of Winn Dixie and Definitely, Maybe. That last film is a surprisingly good little Father's Day film, whereas Huckabees and Winn Dixie are both bad in different ways. They share a misplaced sense of "ask the universe and it will provide...but you have to suffer first" and have meandering plots and scruffy central characters. Huckabees is full of absolutely detestable people though, and I mostly hated it but have a nagging doubt that maybe it's secretly genius and some day I'll suddenly "get it".

 

[Moe_Syzlak]

I Heart Huckabees (2004)
I used to somehow always confuse this with other indies like Because of Winn Dixie and Definitely, Maybe. That last film is a surprisingly good little Father's Day film, whereas Huckabees and Winn Dixie are both bad in different ways. They share a misplaced sense of "ask the universe and it will provide...but you have to suffer first" and have meandering plots and scruffy central characters. Huckabees is full of absolutely detestable people though, and I mostly hated it but have a nagging doubt that maybe it's secretly genius and some day I'll suddenly "get it".

I remember liking Huckabees when I saw it 15+ years ago, but I can’t remember a thing about it. From your description it is possible I liked it because I like comedies about horrible people.

 

[Eyepainter]

I remember liking Huckabees when I saw it 15+ years ago, but I can’t remember a thing about it. From your description it is possible I liked it because I like comedies about horrible people.

Same here! Comedies about horrible people are the best (especially in TV shows like It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia or South Park).

With that aside, though, I'll admit I've never seen I Heart Huckabees, but I've seen a couple of director David O. Russell's other films, mainly Silver Linings Playbook, and American Hustle. And as unpopular as this may be, I hated both of them. I don't even remember anything that happened in American Hustle anymore. I know the term "overrated" is often abused, but boy, is that the best description I have for the director.

 

[mnkykungfu]

^American Hustle is a bit closer to the stuff he used to be more known for, which is this kind of dark, quirky, ensemble comedies. For a mainstream audience, the humor often was too subtle and was distracted from by a lot of dark plot elements and random sub-plots crossing over from different characters, but Russell had a small, dedicated fanbase out of the gate. Maybe check out Flirting With Disaster, Amsterdam, or his almost-buried Nailed.
Personally, I'm more of a basic bitch and I love his more straightforward dramas that find dark humor underneath (rather than vice versa), i.e. The Fighter and Three Kings.

Reveal message: Art vs Artist disclaimer

*It's worth noting that Russell himself is a very controversial figure, known for charity work and championing immigrant causes as well as being kind of a perv and having no control over his temper. Some people dislike him enough to boycott his films.

 

[Ray Danger]

EVIL DEAD RISE.
I liked it very much.

 

[Eyepainter]

Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 3 (2023)

I might end up going to hell for saying this (given the reviews by critics), but I unashamedly think this might be the best movie in the trilogy! I loved how insanely dark this movie went, and it made me appreciate the funnier moments a lot. The villain was unlikable in the best way possible, and Rocket's backstory actually got me shedding a few tears, too. A near-perfect farewell to the Guardians, and highly recommended!

 

[asterixsmeagol]

I also thought it was very good, but I would like to caution anyone that is sensitive to animal cruelty that this move is FULL of pretty tough flashback scenes of Rocket being experimented on, and some other disturbing stuff with three of his friends before he escaped. There is some catharsis the comes toward the end of the movie when the Guardians kill the bad guy of the movie while he is attempting to kill Rocket as he is attempting to rescue a litter of baby raccoons, and a few scenes later when they all help Rocket rescue all of the captive animals. Seriously, I am normally pretty stoic while watching movies but I was on the edge of tears at several points in this movie.

 

[Jrzag42]

I just watched Eraserhead for the second time. It's not a great film to watch alone right before bed. By far the most unsettling movie I've seen. It hit me hard last time, couldn't stop thinking about it for weeks, not sure how it's going to affect me this time but I suspect I won't get much sleep. How can a director's first film be so perfect?

 

[Eyepainter]

I also thought it was very good, but I would like to caution anyone that is sensitive to animal cruelty that this move is FULL of pretty tough flashback scenes of Rocket being experimented on, and some other disturbing stuff with three of his friends before he escaped. There is some catharsis the comes toward the end of the movie when the Guardians kill the bad guy of the movie while he is attempting to kill Rocket as he is attempting to rescue a litter of baby raccoons, and a few scenes later when they all help Rocket rescue all of the captive animals. Seriously, I am normally pretty stoic while watching movies but I was on the edge of tears at several points in this movie.

Much as I hate to say it, I'm gonna have to agree with you on this. Still, I respect that this has to be said about a movie made by Disney.

 

[mnkykungfu]

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)
The latest trailer for this already had me tearing up... I was guessing that Peter and Gamora would fall in love all over again, only for her to die again. Or that Drax would nobly sacrifice himself, or Rocket and Groot would go out in a blaze of glory together. Without spoilers let me just say that the film intentionally pulls hard on your heartstrings, but mostly not in the ways I was expecting. I'd knock it for being so manipulative except that these characters have earned it by this point, and this was a near-perfect sendoff for them.

Used Cars (1980)
On the complete other end of the spectrum is this raunchy comedy by "the Bobs", as Spielberg likes to call them. Young man Kurt Russell is a compelling slimeball here, but without much of the sympathy and cool of his Jack Burton character. Mostly this is just OTT antics and lots of T n A; doesn't age well.

We Own This City (2022)
And the final entry in what I suppose is my loud-mouthed schemer-leader trilogy, this multi-layered ensemble lead by Jon Bernthal is a real-life examination of Baltimore law enforcement in the wake of George Floyd's killing. Written and produced by David Simon, this mini-series feels like a brief bonus season of The Wire, though it's an even more bitter pill to swallow, knowing how real all this institutional injustice is because these are almost all real people and real events.

 

[Editzilla]

Star Wars Episode VI: Return Of The Jedi.

Still the definitive ending to the Skywalker Saga, and still kicking myself for missing out on seeing it in theaters recently.....