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SHURI : Black Panther II - shortened and focused - complete

Feedback for post 1

I really like the shortened funeral scene you came up with. My only feedback on that 9ne is a request to retain the drums. They are super present, drop out when the cut happens and then come back in when we see the dancers.

T'Challa's UN speech feels right here. I wonder if you could postpone the "one year later" text until a moment or two after he is done speaking. That would help the viewer take in his final words.

The mining ship feels rushed. This may be due to the audio edits. The audio during the sirens scene is a bit jumpy feeling and sound alike to doesn't quite fit together.

Ramonda and Okoye feels edited due to the intensity of the scene that ramps up without explaination. Is it absolutely necessary to remove Ramonda stripping Okoye of her rank? I can't see Okoye ever quiting.

I really like how you shared all of these. Aspiring editors would be wise to take note of your process here. Fantastic way to get feedback and to streamline the process!
 
Thank you so much for the feedback, I really appreciate it!
DigModiFicaTion said:
I really like the shortened funeral scene you came up with. My only feedback on that 9ne is a request to retain the drums. They are super present, drop out when the cut happens and then come back in when we see the dancers.
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I understand. I think I can do that. I should be able to extract the drums with AI and layer the audio to keep them going.
DigModiFicaTion said:
T'Challa's UN speech feels right here. I wonder if you could postpone the "one year later" text until a moment or two after he is done speaking. That would help the viewer take in his final words.
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I initially had his speech earlier and when going into the next scene it felt disconnected. I want to very much tie these two elements together to clearly accentuate the juxtaposition between T'Challa's word and his mother's actions.
DigModiFicaTion said:
The mining ship feels rushed. This may be due to the audio edits. The audio during the sirens scene is a bit jumpy feeling and sound alike to doesn't quite fit together.
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I did struggle with that. I'll see if I can do anything with that audio, it is tricky.
DigModiFicaTion said:
Ramonda and Okoye feels edited due to the intensity of the scene that ramps up without explaination. Is it absolutely necessary to remove Ramonda stripping Okoye of her rank? I can't see Okoye ever quiting.
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hmm... I think so to be honest. When I was watching, I just got the sense that Ramonda was not a very likeable character. it felt very over the top. I think that we do still need to empathise with her to be able to then empathise with how Shuri feels. It's also like, when Okoye gets stripped of rank, that is something that is done to her and that she must recover from and reinforces her subplot. by making this something that Okoye does, it realigns the narrative back to the core characters. I understand you saying she would never quit, and of course she stayed there with Killmonger in control, but I think if she is being prevented from doing her job, it is going to be just as bad as being stripped of rank? In any case, it's not as though she says "I quit" so it's ambiguous and it just allows her to diverge from the central military structure.
DigModiFicaTion said:
I really like how you shared all of these. Aspiring editors would be wise to take note of your process here. Fantastic way to get feedback and to streamline the process!
Click to expand...
Thank you, I do like how this turned out. it is a lot of work to do this kind of post though so I'm not sure how many people will try it.
 
My thoughta on Ramonda are based on parental grief. I can't say I wouldn't do the same thing if I lost my son and then my daughter who I reluctantly placed in the protection of Okoye when they went to America. Not meaning that to push back, just to clarify why I think Coogler did it the way he presented.
 
DigModiFicaTion said:
My thoughta on Ramonda are based on parental grief. I can't say I wouldn't do the same thing if I lost my son and then my daughter who I reluctantly placed in the protection of Okoye when they went to America. Not meaning that to push back, just to clarify why I think Coogler did it the way he presented.
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Thanks for the perspective. I don't have kids so I hadn't thought of it like this. There is still the desire to take focus away from Okoye's story, but I'll have a look and think on it.

edit:
looking through this scene, I still feel stripping her of rank is unnecessary. it creates this tension between her and Okoye that sticks in my mind. I think Ramonda's emotions are made very clear and with her stripping Okoye of rank, it sets up conflict, where Okoye is being destroyed from above. On the other hand, removing the strip of rank, it is a more level communication. Okoye has not been as heavily 'injured' and is more receptive to Ramonda's emotions. then when she places her spear into the ground, it is like she is saying " I understand how I have failed you and i am not worthy". It is less of a barrage of angst and more of a communication. I feel it makes Ramonda's speech far more powerful and empathetic.
 
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Interesting take on it. We definitely see the scene differently. One of the hallmarks movies :)
 
I'm sorry you're feeling discouraged by the low engagement on this thread. I just want to chime into say that while I'm not particularly interested in this edit (I just really couldn't get into the original version of the movie), I have thought that that clips I've seen of your edits have been well done, and I'm looking forward to your Star Wars and LotR edits when they're ready. I hope that's a helpful thing to say and that I'm not making you feel worse. Keep up the good work!
 
asterixsmeagol said:
I'm sorry you're feeling discouraged by the low engagement on this thread. I just want to chime into say that while I'm not particularly interested in this edit (I just really couldn't get into the original version of the movie), I have thought that that clips I've seen of your edits have been well done, and I'm looking forward to your Star Wars and LotR edits when they're ready. I hope that's a helpful thing to say and that I'm not making you feel worse. Keep up the good work!
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Even I never imagined quite how much that lifts my spirits. To see people mention my star wars and LOTR edits, it is deeply satisfying. It doesn't just lift my heart, it lifts my stomach. In a good way ofc 😆
I really need to try and remember this.
 
I would also like to echo what other members on here have said. I really appreciate the effort you put into theses edits and your edits are the only way I will watch any Marvel movies as there quality has gone downhill since Endgame and your edits make them enjoyable, so please don't give up on them. I have also showed your edits to friends and family and they have much prefered your edits over the original. I hope this encourages you to keep going and also apologize that I don't interact as much, but I do follow your threads and leave reviews after release.
 
stevepaynter said:
I would also like to echo what other members on here have said. I really appreciate the effort you put into theses edits and your edits are the only way I will watch any Marvel movies as there quality has gone downhill since Endgame and your edits make them enjoyable, so please don't give up on them. I have also showed your edits to friends and family and they have much prefered your edits over the original. I hope this encourages you to keep going and also apologize that I don't interact as much, but I do follow your threads and leave reviews after release.
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Thank you, it definitely does help. Not sure how many more MCU movies I might edit though. My current projects may be it, as I have lost faith in the MCU after quantumania. I've had a request to do Ms Marvel though so I may consider that at some point, but I'd really like to go back to star wars and lotr after such nice comments.
 
I have rebuilt the audio for this bit, to make the siren song continuous, i'm not sure if it improves the situation though.
This is my new version

This is the previous version
 
Because it's a real sound in the movie (diagetic), I think it's best that we don't hear it until the first guy does. After that, it's ok for the "sonic attack" to penerate the walls and become background music of sorts. Are you trying improve the audio transition at 00:57? If so, you may need to strip out the background noise entirely from the scene and rebuild from scratch. Then you'll have perfect parity on the volume, frequencies, etc.
 
It's actually a really uncomfortable scene to listen to with headphones. And I'm referring to the source material, not your clips. They went really hard on the high frequency "machine" sounds in that environment, and it comes across like they left the gain too high on the pickups. The more I listen, the more it hurts. It would be a lot of work to fix, but if it also solves your issue...
 
futon88 said:
you may need to strip out the background noise entirely from the scene and rebuild from scratch. Then you'll have perfect parity on the volume, frequencies, etc.
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That's what I did.

I matched the siren song music track with the part where they put the earplugs in and it runs continuously throughout.

I agree that it should come in after the guy notices it. It doesn't line up though. One option is for me to very slightly tweak the tempo.

futon88 said:
It's actually a really uncomfortable scene to listen to with headphones. And I'm referring to the source material, not your clips. They went really hard on the high frequency "machine" sounds in that environment, and it comes across like they left the gain too high on the pickups. The more I listen, the more it hurts. It would be a lot of work to fix, but if it also solves your issue...
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I can pull down the high frequencies a bit. I think they meant for the scene to be uncomfortable, but I wouldn't want it to be painful.
 
Are you trying to solve the volume boost at 00:57? As in, when he begins to speak, and we hear the background noise fade in with his words?
 
futon88 said:
Are you trying to solve the volume boost at 00:57? As in, when he begins to speak, and we hear the background noise fade in with his words?
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oh sorry, no not that. although that seems to be either a phantom or it got resolved. I'm looking at the waveform and there's no obvious increase on any of my tracks, so it was probably the music doing that. that would be ironed out since I put the music in fresh.
This is all about geting the audio to run more smoothly, not sound so choppy and to give a better feeling of pace through the scene.
 
I'm not really down for this edit. Haven't even seen the original. But I'm certainly down for you as an editor. Here. At this forum. You won't get the kind of appreciation that you can get here anywhere.😊🥰

Cool new avatar!
 
Thank you :)
It's pretty much a true representation of me ^^

here is what I'm thinking of for the poster/cover.
g3e0h06.png
 
That's very cool. I would use very minimal small text. Maybe, the Justice League font. Sample one of the colors already present in the poster for a subdued effect?
 
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